eats fried coffee with other caveman types...

>>neeeeee--deep<<

>>rrribit--rrrribit<<

>>chirp--chirp<<

>>neeeee--deep<<

>>crickets<<

>>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<< >>chirp--chirp<<

Sounds like a great time to shove the pointy end of a cowboy boot into someone's daddy button....

...or...

... make a fist and exercise a sharp yet distinct downward strike on the collar bone, it only take 30 pounds of pressure to break it....

...or...

... knees make great targets for the heel end of a high-heeled shoe...

...or...

... thumbs fit right in between the eyeball and the nose and cause near irreparable damage while gouging...

... or...

For everything else there is Smith & Wesson, Purse Addition...


(notice the hollow-points waiting in each chamber... oh yeah...)



Smith & Wesson "Lady Smith" .357 Magnum

I'm sort of more of an On Your Face kind of guy rather than In Your Face...

... ummm

... actually......

Looks like its about time for the station to go off the air for the night... so I figured I'd do Woody and Feral the honors of playing the Star Spangled Banner....



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qciWEufZ2xA (click me, click me...)



"Oh, say can you see by the dawn's early light

What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?

Whose broad stripes and bright stars thru the perilous fight,

O'er the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming?

And the rocket's red glare, the bombs bursting in air,

Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.

Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?"

















Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

>>neeeeeee--deep<<

>>ribit<<

>>neeeeeee--deep<<

>>chirp--chirp<<

And now for a word from our sponsors....

.... does your family need something new in its meal time routine?

.... wanna be the life of the party at the next family reunion pot luck dinner?

.... well, we have just the product you have been looking for!!!!






Ingredients: : Farm raised Crickets (Gryllus Linnaeus).

Guaranteed Analysis:

Crude Protein, min, 20.0%
Crude Fat, min, 5.0%
Crude Fiber, max, 1.0%
Crude Ash, max, 3.0%
Moisture content, max, 75.0%

Feeding Instructions: Offer your loved ones and family members 2-4 crickets per serving. A plastic lid is included to make storage easy! This product may be fed to children of any age. Babies may not eat them right away, but one day, they will get the taste for them, and boy oh boy, you better have a good supply on hand!

This product must be refrigerated after opening.

And the next topic for tonight....

DO CRICKETS HAVE A LITTLE MARKET WHERE THEY BUY THOSE FUNNY LITTLE >>chirp--chirp<< SOUND DEVICES?



AND....



IS IT THE SAME STORE WHERE FROGS GET THEIR CROAKERS?



AND....



ARE THERE POST-PUBESCENT TEENAGERS WORKING AT THE PLACE WHERE THEY HAVE THEM INSTALLED, SORT OF LIKE GOING TO A CAR STEREO INSTALLATION PLACE?



AND....



WHO TRAINS THE FROGS AND CRICKETS TO CHIRP AND CROAK ONLY AT NIGHT?

<<shifts his eyes from left to right... glances over each shoulder for a moment... notices he is the only one in the room right now...>>

Bring on the taser, dude....

... and while you are at it, throw in the forehead water torture kit, and a couple bundles of fingernail bamboo...

... of course we are talking about the ex-wife....

The King James Bible...

And that's it from "TelephoneMan's Animal Kingdom"...

... now for a word from our sponsors...

*****************

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the garden....

.... after months of therapy, recovering from your "Great Pumpkin Aphobia"....

Its.....



...one more damned hallucinogenic thing to fear...



Getting Help


American Psychological Association
(202) 336-5500
750 First St., N.E.
Washington, DC 20002
http://www.apa.org/

American Psychiatric Association
(202) 682-6000
1400 K St., N.W.
Washington, DC 20005
http://www.psych.org/

Freedom From Fear, Inc.
(718) 351-1717
308 Seaview Ave.
Staten Island, NY 10305

National Mental Health Association
(1-800) 969-6642
1021 Prince St.
Alexandria, VA 22314-2971
http://www.nmha.org/

Phobics Anonymous
(619) 322-2673
P.O. Box 1180
Palm Springs, CA 92263

National Alliance for the Mentally Ill
(1-800) 950-6264
200 Glebe Road
Suite 1015
Arlington, VA 22203-3754

Anxiety Disorders Association of America
(301) 231-9350
6000 Executive Boulevard
Suite 513
Rockville, MD 20852



... because its never too late to seek treatment for the fear of Johnny Potato.......

...now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

My only-est, best-est friend in the whole world... Koko..... named after Koko Taylor, the blues singer

... OK... ya'll gotta suffer me this just one time on here... (she's my baby...)






















"I have him so trained to scratch my chin..."



OK, so when she wants a doggie biscuit, she can't be denied....

Oh, that's easy... The Kentucky Derby......

we must be related..... my family does the same thing.... so glad when they just leave me the hell alone and never write, never call, and never ever once have they ever came to visit... weeeee

To NOT celebrate Christmas with each other (or at all) anymore, that's our tradition.

I will be alone with my dog on Christmas day.

Just another day I guess.



Christmas is crap.

I'll be glad when it is over, as I always am.

Blah......