Mesmerizing

Every Breath You Take - The police

Orangutan

Sweet Lullaby - Deep Forest

Loss

Flamingo

Sofa

Remember the Time - Michael Jackson

Hovering

Real

"Don't Quit when things go wrong, as they sometimes will, 
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill, 
When the funds are low and the debts are high, 
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, 
When care is pressing you down a bit, 
Rest, if you must, but don't you quit."

Blue

Dingo

Night fever - Bee Gees

Have you ever wondered where the phrase, "You’ve Gotta Be Kiddin' Me?" came from?

Well, it just so happens to have originated through the Father of our Country Way back when, George Washington was crossing the Delaware River with his troops. There were 33 (remember this number) in Washington 's boat. It was extremely dark and storming furiously and the water was tossing them about.

Finally, Washington grabbed Corporal Cox (remember this name) and stationed him at the front of the boat with a lantern. He ordered him to keep swinging it, so they could see where they were heading.

Corporal Cox, through driving rain and cold, continued swinging the lantern back and forth, back and forth. Then a big gust of wind and a wave hit and threw Corporal Cox and his lantern into the Delaware. Washington and his troops searched for nearly an hour trying to find Corporal Cox, but to no avail. All of them felt terrible, for the Corporal had been one of their favorites.

Sometime later, Washington and his troops landed on the other side, wet and totally exhausted. He rallied the troops and told them that they must go on.

Another hour later, one of his men said, "General, I see lights ahead."

They trudged toward the lights and came upon a huge house. What they didn't know, was that this was a house of ill repute hidden in the forest to serve all who came. General Washington pounded on the door, his men crowding around him. The door swung open, and much to his surprise stood a beautiful woman. A huge smile came across her face, to see so many men standing there.


Washington was the first to speak, "Madam, I am General George Washington and these are my men. We are tired, wet, exhausted, and desperately need warmth and comfort."

Again, the Madam looked at all the men standing there, and with a broad smile on her face, said, "Well, General, you have come to the right place. We can surely give you warmth and comfort. How many men do you have?"

Washington replied, "Well, madam, there are 32 of us without Cox."

And the Madam said, "You've Gotta Be Kiddin' Me."

Suzie went to the doctor complaining of body odor.

"Do you wash?" the doc asked the rank young girl.

"Oh, yes," Suzie answered. "Each morning, I start at my head and wash down as far as possible. Then I start at my feet and wash up as far up as possible."

"Well," the doc concluded, "go home and wash your possible."

Inn

Near

Docile

In the year 2018, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States, and said:"Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me.""Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans."He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have 6 months to build the ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard, but there was no ark."Noah! I'm about to start the rain! Where is the ark?""Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed.""I needed a building permit.""I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system.""My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.""Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.""Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl.""I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls, but no go!""When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodations were too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.""Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.""I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew.""Immigration and Naturalization are checking the green-card status of most of the people who want to work.""The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with ark-building experience."To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.""So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark."Suddenly, the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky.Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?""No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it."