Community > Posts By > PlainVanilla76

 
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Wed 06/27/18 09:43 PM

For the one-billionth time; no response IS a response, it means NO THANKS


I agree with you. However, in one instance, someone clicked the "Yes" button for interest, and clicked an "attracted to" button for a photo. I messaged her, mentioning some of the things she talked about in her profile which I really liked. The message was read but never responded to. This particular instance was very confusing to me.

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Wed 06/27/18 09:31 PM
I appreciate the feedback, thank you. I started using a different dating site about three weeks ago and found mingle2 when looking for a dating forum. I have not messaged anyone here. diserli_gears and Nice_Bratty_Lady basically confirmed what I thought. That's all I was looking for, to know if I'm doing something wrong or not.

That a person bombarded with messages does not have time to respond is reasonable. When I post on Craigslist, related to housing, I often do get more than a hundred replies, and find myself unable to respond to everyone. If this is how it is for women using online dating, that's not an easy position to be in...

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Wed 06/27/18 05:42 PM
Hi all, I've been having some difficulty getting responses to messages I send, and am wondering what's wrong, or if this is normal.

I have a vague understanding that possibly there are many more men using online dating than women, and perhaps they are bombarded with messages -- too many to reply to. If you're a woman, is this your experience? Men, do many of your messages go unanswered?

The alternative is of course unpleasant for me to think about, that I'm just totally failing with many of my attempts. My messages are generally about the length of this post I'm writing now, and I usually spend at least an hour thinking of something relevant to say, as related to the person's profile and shared interests.

So there you have it. Do women get too many messages? Am I failing? Something else?

Stats over three weeks: 19 messages sent, 6 replies.

(This is not a complaint post. I am pleased to receive the responses I got.)

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Fri 06/22/18 09:23 PM
Hi all, I'm new to this, am pretty confused, and have a bunch of questions.

My first question is, do women prefer older men? Detail below:

I am looking to start a relationship with someone my age (41). I think I've probably seen close to 300 profiles in the past three weeks. While women my age include my age in what they are looking for, their age range shown heavily favors older men (often +10 years or more).

Looking at profiles of women about five years older than me, I see the same trend. And again, looking at profiles of women about five years younger than me, I see the same trend.

Adding to the confusion, a woman I know who is almost my age IRL who has been using online dating for over a year told me she mostly receives messages from men +10 to +20 years older, but she wants to meet someone her age. Granted, that's just one person's experience and view, but it doesn't help with my confusion.

And to be fair, I AM making an assumption. If someone has an age range starting at their age -5 at the low end, and their age +10 at the high end, I'm assuming there is a preference for older men.

Any insights? Thank you!