greenEyed_MeadoWoman's photo
Sun 09/30/07 02:54 AM
No, I wouldn't want anything to do with either of my ex's. I do think they are kind, talented, good men. One's that I would say to a girlfriend if they were interested that they might check out. But when I ended the relationships with them, I was done.

Is it the same in the reverse? No.

One asked me if it was okay that he was dating someone else (I guess on the off chance that I would change my mind and want to get back together?, not because he felt he needed permission). Later he wanted to run it by me that he was getting married (I guess still hoping I'd change my mind and want him back). A few years after he married, he apologized to me for about five hours and said he was so sorry, that he didn't know what he had when he was with me and wished he had tried harder when it mattered. It meant alot, those words. We were young. And his wife had become a crystal meth addict who apparently was pretty cruel to live with. But it was too late.

Another gets all sentimental about this or that when he comes in the house, when the kids aren't around, when we're alone. To be honest, it gives me the creeps. I spent most of eleven years with a man I didn't love, for the sake of two children that we have together.

The thing is, if you don't appreciate what you have when you have it, meaning being committed, caring about communication, not taking a person for granted, trying to make that person feel special just like you did when you met, things end.

And in my opinion, my mistake in both those relationships was falling for someone who was very attracted to me when the feeling just wasn't there in return. I made the mistake of not knowing my own self enough to just stay clear of their undying devotion and attentiveness when I didn't have the same feelings or attraction to them. I did try in the relationships, but when they did not, it made sticking around feel alot less rewarding.

greenEyed_MeadoWoman's photo
Sun 09/30/07 02:30 AM
No actually iceprincess, I don't. I just think that this post was very funny. Whether you like my opinion or not, it was my reaction to what I read.

greenEyed_MeadoWoman's photo
Sat 09/29/07 12:13 PM
You know, I have to respond to the potshot at women and the clothing they wear after having kids. I don't think it was cool to post that. Maybe for an inside "guy" laugh at the expense of women.

I have 3 children, and each one is a miracle to me. No, I don't look like the 94 lb girl I was before baby 1. But if you asked around, you'd still probably hear that I am an elegant and beautiful woman. Generalites aren't funny.

The truth for alot of women is that after having children their bodies change. And for men, that becomes a problem. In our culture there's an expectation of perfection for women, but check out the same expectation of men. Tell me if you don't see fat, ugly, bald, old, below average men in the same images a good portion of the time. The message? You can be a very average or below average guy and that's ok, but you must be stunning if you are a woman.

Here's one back at you.

In their twenties, guys are trim and muscular.

In their thirties, the belly comes out.

In their forties, the hair is grey (if they have any of it left), and the belly gets bigger.

That's a truth too, no?

I guess what I am trying to say is why blanket "all women" with generalities. Not true of everyone. Neither is what I said.