hey war, can u supersize 'em for me? lol

but hey they are soooo funny!

(With hands on shoulders) Oh, those are shoulder blades, I thought they were wings.

Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!

Are you busy tonight at 3:00 A.M.?

Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven is a long way from here.

Are you O.K.? Because heaven is a long fall from here.
(As s/he is leaving) Hey aren't you forgetting something? S/he: What? Me!

Baby, somebody better call God, cuz he's missing an angel!

Bond. James Bond.

Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"] I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the man/woman of my dreams. OR: I want to call your mother and thank her.

Did it hurt? S/he: Did what hurt? When you fell out of heaven?
Do you come here often?

Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.

Don't worry about it. Nothing that you've ever done before counts. The only thing that matters is that we're together.

Excuse me, but I think I dropped something!!! MY JAW!!

Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart.

Hey...somebody farted. Let's get out of here.

Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?

no need of pillows

lazy

true

like to paint with oil base paint

winning # of the lottery! anybodY!?

ouch!!!

now where was that when i was watching godzilla?????

Bumper stickers 11
If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

A penny saved is ridiculous.

All that glitters has a high refractive index.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

Anarchy is better than no government at all.

Any small object when dropped will hide under a larger object.

Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.

Bill Clinton, Boris Yeltsin, and Bill Gates were called in by God. God informed them that he was very unhappy about what was going on in this world. Since things were so bad, he told the three that he was destroying the Earth in 3 days. They were all allowed to return to their homes and businesses and tell their friends and colleagues what was happening. God did tell them though, that no matter what they did he was "not" changing his mind.

Bill Clinton went in and told his staff, "I have good news and bad news for you. First the good news . . . there "is" a God. The bad news is that he is destroying the Earth in 3 days."

Boris Yeltsin went back and told his staff, "I have good news and terrible news. The first is that there "is" a God. The second is that he is destroying the Earth in 3 days."

Bill Gates went back and told his staff, "I have good news and good news. First, God thinks I am one of the three most important people in the world. Secondly, you don't have to fix the bugs in Windows 95.

yeah working on that safe list lol

THANKS. i will add that to the list txangela lol

thanks

HE : Can I buy you a drink?
SHE : Actually I'd rather have the money.

HE : I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
SHE : I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

HE : Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE : Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

HE : How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE : I must've been given your share.

HE : Will you go out with me this Saturday?
SHE : Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

HE : Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE : And your face must turn a few stomachs.
HE : Go on ,don't be shy. Ask me out.
SHE : Okay, get out.

HE : I think I could make you very happy.
SHE : Why? Are you leaving?

HE : What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE : Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

HE : Can I have your name?
SHE : Why? Don't you already have one?

HE : Shall we go see a movie?
SHE : I've already seen it.

HE : Where have you been all my life?
SHE : Hiding from you.

HE : Haven't I seen you some place before?
SHE : Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

HE : Is this seat empty?
SHE : Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

HE : So, what do you do for a living?
SHE : I'm a female impersonator.

HE : Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE : Do not enter.

HE : Your body is like a temple.
SHE : Sorry, there are no services today.

HE : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE : If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

loud

typing or talking to people

wonder how she gets to be soo hot!

supersize me? ewwwwww nasty! lol

bicentannial man

alone is a state of mind....i got 3 personnalities so im never alone! lol

if u play ur cards right u wont have to pay for dinner! lol