Here is my 2cents: I am 38. I got divorced last year. After the divorce a guy I bowled with and seen at least 1 a week for a year, offered me a job working for him. I liked him as a person and thought I would like to date him, I also needed a job, so I accepted the job. It wasn't long and we started dating. He was great I was so happy. I moved in with him and then I started noticing things. We were together 24/7. He would get upset if I talked to anyone. It didnt matter if it was a friend or family. He called me all the time. If he didnt get his way he would make it sound like he did so much for me and I didnt do anything for him. He told me how much he loved me, and he even told me how I didnt love him. Now if you haven't caught on yet, this man was controlling. When things were good, they were real good. But when he didn't approve of something I did or that HE THOUGHT was wrong, crap hit the fan. The guilt trips started!!!! When guilt trips didnt work, all the mean things he could think of would come out of his mouth.

Now this man never hit me!!! But emotional abuse is just as bad as physical. I know I have been through that also.

I realized one day that I was asking myself : "wow is what he said true am I like that?" Now I knew better, I wasnt like that but I was still doubting myself. Finally I realized that this man that loved me and that I loved. Was doing nothing more than killing my self esteem!! He was doing it to have control over me. I admit it was very mildly that he was doing this, but i knew the signs and I also talked to friends about it and they told me to get away from him!!! We broke up a few times and I noticed the stronger i was the more argueing we did. I finally told him. I love you but for me to be truely happy, I cant be with you. I packed up my things and left. Yep I went back a few times. STUPID!!! But again I kept my eyes open and he was still doing the same thing. Each time we broke up quicker and quicker until a month ago I said goodbye and meant it. I seen him tonight and he told me he thinks of me daily and loves me and wanted to know if I ever thought of him. I told him I do think of him, but we dont see eye to eye and I wouldnt get back with him.

I hope this may help you decide what you want to do. By the way I kept going back to him because of a few reasons. I did love him. I also needed a job (he fired me everytime we broke up). And well my family that I lived with made me feel like I was imposing by staying at there house, no matter what I did, it wasnt good enough either. So I kept going back to him.

Better men are out there.. it may take awhile to find him, but one day you will.