I can't help any more then wishing you have a Very Happy Birthday!

No. Not at all. It seems you have had some experiences that might make you feel this way. But try not to lump everyone together. Not every man is alike. There are some who are very compassionate and understanding.

I don't think that's it. We don't bite. Nibble maybe....


I think it's more that people are fearful of what they don't/can't understand. Which makes sense...we didn't understand it either til it happened to us.

I just read your profile and you can take this for what it's worth.... which is really just about nothing.

Your profile has two sentences in it and the first one focuses on you being widowed and wanting to live life again and the second one simply says you don't want a smoker. I just don't think this says very much about who you are, what you want, and what you like to do. I'm not saying you shouldn't say you're widowed. I'm just saying that, personally, I like to know more about someone. I know that many people say that the profile doesn't really matter to them. But I think many people do read them and look for some connection or common interest or something that just strikes them. Maybe a little more information would bring better results.



Ok i did if that not ok sorry

There is no "ghost" to compete with. Just because someone was once married to someone who happened to die does not make them tainted material. All that's happened is they've gone through an extremely unfortunate experience. There is nothing that says they have to come to a dead stop (no pun intended) as far as ever dating or being dated again. Yes, the memory of that person will always be there in the back of their mind, some more prevalent than others, and NO ONE has the right to attempt to take that memory away from them or try to replace it. To do so would be narcissistic. Personally, I would never attempt to "fill the shoes" of a deceased spouse, but I can certainly help the widow carry on to learn to enjoy life and be happy again. It's the position of the widow/widower to decide if they wish to pursue further interests with someone new, or if they choose not to, and that decision should be respected, whichever they choose.

HI Tammy, I've been a widow for 2 1/2 yrs now.. My name is Carole, nice to meet you..

I understand that. I sure do. What do you do with your time? Do you have kids?

You're welcome. Anything I can do to help, I will. That is what I thought it was so important to have a widow/er board. Because these issues come up all the time in emails between us and re entering the dating world is at least as important as other things we have to deal with.