Community > Posts By > lilmissjessica

 
lilmissjessica's photo
Mon 08/03/09 06:57 PM

First of all, as I told someone else a few days ago, when you make a post on a public forum and then ask for opinions or advice, you are putting yourself out there and allowing yourself to be insulted, ridiculed, judged, looked down upon and more. If you don't want people to give their honest opinions, you shouldn't ask for them. I am not being mean, I am being honest. I don't ask people on here for their opinions about anything I do or plan to do, and if they give them and I don't want them, I deal with that appropriately.

I never, ever ask for opinions about subjects that are personal to me, because I'm pretty sure I won't like the answer. Some people believe in abortion, some people believe in adoption, some people believe it's best to keep their child, no matter the situation and do the best they can to raise it. Those are personal choices, and only the person who is in that situation knows what is best for them. I have no idea what you are going through; I have never been pregnant, and I never plan to become pregnant, so I'd never say "oh you should do this because-" or "you're wrong to feel this way because-" I think people who do that are full of crap. Until something like this happens to you, you don't get it. So I won't pretend that I do.

Secondly, the unborn child's father is a jerk, pure and simple. You didn't get yourself pregnant on your own, so yeah, it's his fault too. I'd be on the phone to the proper authorities about child support and anything else you might need as soon as possible if I were you. I get so sick of men sitting around whining about not wanting to pay child support and how "she" ruined his life. That's crap, too. I tell them if they don't want a kid, use protection or get a freaking vasectomy- yeah, I'm sure it "lessens the feeling" but so does an unwanted, unplanned pregnancy, and most of the time, if you force a father to be around a child he never wanted, the child ends up being abused.

Thirdly, take it from someone who does know this- do not drink around men. Never! You lose your inhibitions and you do things you probably wouldn't do sober. It is a bad bad bad idea. If you have to drink something around a guy, have a soda, have some juice, but do not drink alcohol.

Fourthly, do what you think YOU can live with, this is your life; it's not about what we think, your parents think, the child's father thinks, it's about you. It sounds like you have decided that giving the child up for adoption will be the best thing for you, it, and your other child. That is up to you. Only you know what's best. I commend you on making your own decision. It shows character.

Lastly, don't let other people make you feel bad about what you've done; learn from your mistakes and victories and move on. Be a good mother to your current child and your future children if you plan to have any.

Good luck.flowerforyou


well thank you i was going to delete it but i dont know how on here

lilmissjessica's photo
Mon 08/03/09 06:46 PM
from white bluff below dickson county

lilmissjessica's photo
Mon 08/03/09 04:33 PM

First off I want to commend you for having this baby in a world where many in your position are pressured to abort, not realizing the trauma that it can bring later (as I've seen in my mother). You are doing the right thing, and years from now regardless of what happens to this baby, you can always take solace in the fact you gave it a chance to live.

Second, so as to not be put into this position again in your future, you may want to consider abstaining from sex until at the least you are sure you will be able to care for another child. As you know it only takes one time, one failed birth control method for you to become pregnant. As an addition to that you would also be wise to keep yourself out of situations and places where you feel you may be compromised in this area.

Good luck to you, and as I said before you are doing the right thing. Take care of yourself, if you ever need someone to talk to about this, feel free to send a message. flowerforyou flowerforyou


well thank you

lilmissjessica's photo
Mon 08/03/09 02:05 PM

BIRTH CONTROL. !!!

ESP if your single!!!

Jmo:heart:


a little to late for birth control dont you think

lilmissjessica's photo
Mon 08/03/09 02:04 PM

im not judging you in any way, would you keep the baby if you were in a relationship?


yeah i would it hard though to raise two by yourself

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 07:15 PM



do what you think is best for you and the baby. its easy for everyone else to say do this or do that.


i want it but i cant afford it so i am going to give it to someone who can


I wish you the best with your difficult decision. I raised my child by myself. When they get older, it does get easier. flowerforyou




thanks i just dont want to do it by myself i already am with my two yr old and her dad dont help and this one i am carring noone is the daddy i told him he told me that my problem not his ..

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 07:10 PM

And one more thing...life gets better as you get older so be patient...we ALL learn from our mistakes. And YES we all make mistakes. My best to you...if you ever need to talk just email me...I will listen.


i know and thanks..happy

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 07:05 PM

do what you think is best for you and the baby. its easy for everyone else to say do this or do that.


i want it but i cant afford it so i am going to give it to someone who can

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 07:03 PM



Jessica, just so you know...I was adopted as a baby myself. I love the parents who adopted me and have no bad feelings for the woman who gave me up. My life has been just fine...the normal ups and downs but all in all just fine!


i know and it not that i dont want it .. it just i struggle everyday to get by me and my two yr old and i know someone would love to have my baby and raise it and can afford it


I know your young and I think its great...you could have opted for an abortion but you chose to give your child life.


i dont believe in abortion i am going to have it i just cant raise my baby it makes me want to cry i want it but i cant keep it so i am going to give it to someone who can afford it

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 06:57 PM

Jessica, just so you know...I was adopted as a baby myself. I love the parents who adopted me and have no bad feelings for the woman who gave me up. My life has been just fine...the normal ups and downs but all in all just fine!


i know and it not that i dont want it .. it just i struggle everyday to get by me and my two yr old and i know someone would love to have my baby and raise it and can afford it

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 06:55 PM


i am trying but everyone thinks it easy being me no i got a two yr old i struggle to raise everyday by myself her dad dont help and i was so wasted i dont remeber having sex bascally i was raped and i am not keeping the baby because i cant raise it and i want to give someone who cant have kids it because i know they would love the baby and be able to raise it


I was not trying to be mean.. I have raised 3 boys by myself, and it is difficult. You said in your post that you got really drunk and that is how it happened... I only suggested to not drink if that is what happens...
If I would have known I would be alone raising mine I may have given them up, was not my situation. It is a very unselfish act to give a baby to someone. Sorry if I hurt your feelings.

flowers


no it not if you cant raise it and there is ppl out there that wants one so i dont care about what you have to say

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 06:54 PM

Maybe it's time to stop drinking.....indifferent
[/quote
if that was your respones why you even write... because really i dont care what you think it not like you aint messed up in your life

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 06:49 PM


i am trying but everyone thinks it easy being me no i got a two yr old i struggle to raise everyday by myself her dad dont help and i was so wasted i dont remeber having sex bascally i was raped and i am not keeping the baby because i cant raise it and i want to give someone who cant have kids it because i know they would love the baby and be able to raise it


If you know that's what you want to do then by all means. I just don't want you to regret anything which is why i said decide carefully

i will

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 06:45 PM
i am trying but everyone thinks it easy being me no i got a two yr old i struggle to raise everyday by myself her dad dont help and i was so wasted i dont remeber having sex bascally i was raped and i am not keeping the baby because i cant raise it and i want to give someone who cant have kids it because i know they would love the baby and be able to raise it

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 06:42 PM
like you are never **** up lol

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 06:36 PM
i was asking yall for a opion not to judge me ok if your going to that i reather not here it i got a mom and dad and dont need another one yall dont know what i been though so take that **** somewhere else

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 05:31 PM
i ****ed up and got pregant again and the guy dont want nothing to do with me and i already have a two yr old do yall think i should give it up for adption to someone who cant have kids and will be happy with it since it was a mistake i was really drunk when i did and and i told the daddy and he told me that my ****ing problem deal with it

lilmissjessica's photo
Sun 08/02/09 05:28 PM
i am new to this site i dont know how this damn thing works. lol hope it gets better