The Pope decided to grant absolution to three sinners.

The first person to come up was Howard Stern. The Pope asked, "What is your sin?"
"I've offended people all over the country." The Pope replied, "Kneel down. I'll bless you and grant you absolution."

Next was Bill Clinton. "What is your sin?" Clinton said, "I cheated on my wife."
The Pope looks at him and says, "Kneel down, my son. I'll bless you and grant you absolution."

The Pope then asked a third sinner, "What is your name?" "Monica Lewinsky."
The Pope said, "Maybe you should remain standing."