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| Topic: Tell-tale Signs you're a Loser | |
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You have a wife and a cigarette holder - neither one works.
If it rained soup you would have a fork instead of a spoon. You've had bad luck with two wives, The first on left you, and the second one won't. You got a divorce and all you got was custody of her parents'. You waited for years for Dame Fortune to knock on your door, but it was her daughter, Miss fortune, showed up. You worked two years on your boss's signature, then the perfectly forget check came back, marked 'Insufficient Funds'. If you went into the men's pants business, men would start wearing kilts. You're as useless as a one legged man at an ass kicking contest. Couldn't hit the side of the barn from the inside with all the doors shut. Your boss would gladly pay you what you're worth, but it's against the Minimum Wage Law. You bought a house with lots of doors for opportunity to knock on, but only her 'relatives' did. You couldn't direct traffic down a one-way street. You're a two-handicap golfer - you have a boss who won't let you off early, and a wife who keeps you home weekends. You have delusions of adequacy.  
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