i am sorry its so long
i met a young lady on feb. 23rd,(lets call her Kay).had lunch with her and spent the day with her,it was real nice .1st time i have been on a "date" since my wife passed away in july.kinda felt guilty.
i went to church on sunday following and it felt like the preacher was talking to me like i was the only one in the church.he was saying that i needed to dhange my life to make it better.i realized that i need to stop holding on to my wife like she is going to come back.to move on with my life and stop being sad and miserable everyday.
i later talked to kay that sunday and told her that i had alot of things in my life that i needed to close.she then tells me "i feel the same way ,take your time, i am not going anywhere" this made me feel good about what i needed to do.
i talked to her tuesday and she told me that she didnt think i was ready for a realtionship.which i might not be but i needed to start with someone.
thursday she calls me and tells me she has relapsed,that she was drinking after being sober for 9 months.i had no idea about this.she is in A.A. and everything.i pick her up and take her to my house and we sit and talk for a while.she is feeling real guilty about it.i spent friday and saturday with her as well
on sunday i can sense that there is something wrong with her.over the weekend i have been very open with her and felt that she was the same with me .when i brought her to her house i sat her next to me and told her this "i dont think you are ready for a relationship,that there are some things in your life you need to get straight and there is a possibility that i might be a negative impact on her life that i didnt need to be a distraction so i am going to step aside and let you get yourself together.take your time ,i am not going anywhere."
i told her that she could call me tomorrow,next week ,next month,or never,whatever is good for you.
did i do the right thing by bowing out so she could fix herself without the distraction of a boyfriend(potential problem)?


for the guys let me discribe her
30 years old
no kids
5'8"
125lbs
very,very,veeeerrrrry fit body(how the hell did i score this i dont know)
very pretty face
stupid money,(example:$1100.00 shopping spree at the mall for no reason)
i hope she calls me!

good luck & congrats on meeting her just take your time with her if she does call back

Stop hold the Beat, a minute i got something to say while this weed is in me i dunno if i ever told you this but i love dawg i got your back, if you ever need someone off who's throat is it

I dont think either one of you is ready for a relationship...
Are you sure your not thinking with the wrong head? (no offense)
Good luck!

Yes, you did the right thing. When and if she is ready she will return to you. Give her space, time, and support. Good luck to you. You sound like a real gentleman.

You'll surely end up in the "friend zone" if you don't snatch this one up. Why look at yourself as a distraction instead of as a support? Introduce her to me, I'll help her through this!

I was just kidding about the introduce her to me part, I don't need the drama. Good luck with her.

thank you lilith i think i did do the right thing ,hey she kinda looks like you lilith ,same haircut and pretty smile

thats why i bowed out madtown ,so there would be one less ounce of drama for her to deal with

If things progress, just make sure you understand what she is dealing with, and that her drinking does not have anything at all, ever, to do with you. It's a big issue but not insurmountable.