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| Topic: Date him or not? | |
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So i met this guy on here that i REALLY like. We get along perfectly and have so much in common! He is such a sweetheart!! We have been talking for a one and a half months but have not met in person yet because he is almost 14 hours away. But there is a chance for me to work this summer closer: I'd be about 4 hours away if i chose to move.
Last night i had a conversation with him about us, and they way it went we decided not to talk for a few days. I needed to think about how much i wanted to invest myself in a relationship that was progressing, but would still be a lot of work....  So what do i do? Any advice would help!!!! |
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we don't have enough to go on. why did you decide not to talk for a few days. did he or did he not want to meet you. same for you. we need more info
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tough one. Sounds like you did it though. Take the few days to reflect on whats going on and see how you really feel. This will remove you from the spur of the moment decisions. All I can say is I once met and then married someone from a coast away........so go slow.......lol. Good luck.
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It's up to you! Only you can tell if he's worth the effort.
Think about those days you decided to not talk. Did you keep thinking about him? Or did you find it hard to go through the day knowing you won't be having your little chat with him. All I know is, only you know for sure. And that it doesn't hurt to try something that you think will make you happy. |
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if you have to think about whether to meet him to move closer then its not ment to be
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Date them...
Just DON'T relocate at this time. You have not known them long enough or good enough to relocate. Don't do something you will regret doing later... |
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We decided not to talk because i said that we were too far away and i was getting frustrated not having met him yet...i guess just wanting too much!!
 And he wants to meet me... He even said that if he were closer we would be together and not having this discussion. It was actually his idea to take a while to think when i said i was frustrated tho. And i want to meet him... In fact i think he's the most amazing man- that i've never actually met. But i am confused and concerned over this! |
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My opinion is that you need to go and spend a few days with him. Stay in a hotel and just go out on a few dates together. Until you spend time in person you have no reall basis to even consider it.
Plus, even 4 hours away turns into a long distance relationship and there is a low percentage od success. maybe you can find a nuetral location if he is agreeable. Just my thoughts Shawn |
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Thanks everyone for sharing....It's helped me to think!!
But i still want to know if this guy and i still continue talking, and aren't able to meet for a while, should i still try and see if anything can work?? |
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We decided not to talk because i said that we were too far away and i was getting frustrated not having met him yet...i guess just wanting too much!! And he wants to meet me... He even said that if he were closer we would be together and not having this discussion. It was actually his idea to take a while to think when i said i was frustrated tho. And i want to meet him... In fact i think he's the most amazing man- that i've never actually met. But i am confused and concerned over this! i know that sometimes the distance can be a problem for some people. i have traveled half way around the world but that is me. if you both agreed to not talk for a few days and both of yall miss talking then maybe you should meet. but meet in a safe open public place. talk and learn more about each other because things really are different online than in real life. be ready for happiness and sorrow. in the end the decision is yours alone but caution is always a good thing. i hope that helps |
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We decided not to talk because i said that we were too far away and i was getting frustrated not having met him yet...i guess just wanting too much!! And he wants to meet me... He even said that if he were closer we would be together and not having this discussion. It was actually his idea to take a while to think when i said i was frustrated tho. And i want to meet him... In fact i think he's the most amazing man- that i've never actually met. But i am confused and concerned over this! i know that sometimes the distance can be a problem for some people. i have traveled half way around the world but that is me. if you both agreed to not talk for a few days and both of yall miss talking then maybe you should meet. but meet in a safe open public place. talk and learn more about each other because things really are different online than in real life. be ready for happiness and sorrow. in the end the decision is yours alone but caution is always a good thing. i hope that helps  yeah i have some thinking to do!  but thanks 
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Want some advise from someone who has met someone online (more than once). We meet, I really start to like them. Then I find out that the one guy had many ladies online, and a fiance. Now they all aren't like him (I hope). But please take your time! Meet, see how you get along. It's easy to get along on the phone or online. Don't jump into anything. And listen to your gut, it never lies......
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Based on what I have read, seems that frustration has settled in and you are now wondering if this is worth it. Here is the thing, and hopefully with the few days to think without talking to him, you will get an idea on what you want to do. Right now, do you feel it is worth it to meet him? Has the conversations you have had led you to believe that he is someone that you are feeling a small connection with? Do both of you feel the same about meeting, and based on the convos, are you close to being sure that he is being honest? Like someone mentioned, you can't tell what can or will be with someone until you meet them in person. Once you see them, and observe them, and get to know them in person, then you can start to guage where you are at with him and he can guage where he is at with you. I think that should you guys decide to meet, and since you live so far away, that maybe meeting at a neutral spot would be in order. Put you guys on a level playing field, so to speak.
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Edited by
single_callie
on
Fri 02/08/08 06:01 PM
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Based on what I have read, seems that frustration has settled in and you are now wondering if this is worth it. Here is the thing, and hopefully with the few days to think without talking to him, you will get an idea on what you want to do. Right now, do you feel it is worth it to meet him? Has the conversations you have had led you to believe that he is someone that you are feeling a small connection with? Do both of you feel the same about meeting, and based on the convos, are you close to being sure that he is being honest? Like someone mentioned, you can't tell what can or will be with someone until you meet them in person. Once you see them, and observe them, and get to know them in person, then you can start to guage where you are at with him and he can guage where he is at with you. I think that should you guys decide to meet, and since you live so far away, that maybe meeting at a neutral spot would be in order. Put you guys on a level playing field, so to speak. Yes-yes-and yes!  Sounds like great advice.... I'll have to mention that when we do start talking again! But he also has just deactivated his profile off of here, should i be concerned about that?  Is it a sign???
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Don't read anything into yet Callie. Give it some time and see what happens. Don't worry yourself (I know. Easier said than done). But you two are taking time to think so just do that and then talk and see where you guys stand.
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It's up to you! Only you can tell if he's worth the effort. Think about those days you decided to not talk. Did you keep thinking about him? Or did you find it hard to go through the day knowing you won't be having your little chat with him. All I know is, only you know for sure. And that it doesn't hurt to try something that you think will make you happy. Yeah it was hard at first, but now its been 3 days without him and its kinda been good! Forced me to start doing more things with my friends and being more social- Any more advice?? |
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So what do i do? Any advice would help!!!! What do you WANT? |
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