I will be ( the bravest) the first to see how my funny story rates. Here it is:

A newlywed couple just moved into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?"
The husband just looked at his wife and said, "What do I look like, Mr.Plumber?”

A few days went by, and he comes home from work and again his wife asks for a favor, "Honey, the car won't start, I think that it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?"

"What do I look like, Mr.Goodwrench?" was his response. Another couple of weeks go by, and it's raining pretty hard. His wife then finds a leak in the roof. She pleads with him as he's walking through the door. "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?"

He just looked at her and said "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" and sat down with a beer and watched a game on TV.

One weekend the husband woke up and it was pouring pretty hard, but the leak on the roof was gone! Speaking of leaks, he also went to take a shower, and he found that the one pipe behind the sink wasn't leaking anymore either.

His wife was coming home just then, and as she walked through the door, the husband asked, "Honey, how come there aren't any more leaks, and the car's running?"

She replied nonchalantly, "Oh, the other day I was picking up the mail, and I ran into one of our new neighbors, Jon. What a nice man. He came over and fixed everything." "Wow, did he charge us anything?" asked the husband. "No, he just said that he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or had sex with him" she said.

"Cool. What kind of cake did you make?" asked the husband. "Cake? What the hell do you think I look like, Betty Crocker?

I give myself a "9".

i gotta ask you to stop reposting everything thats been posted already.
find some new stuff please.

That was funny! I like that one!

Ok. Wonderbread, I will. Ok people, we need fresh , new material.

go to newsgroups at searchalot, i'm not leading you astray, they're there by the hundreds

Ok
This guy's wife is complaing to him, that her breast are to small, and she is thinking about having implants.
But her husband reminds her that at the present time they can't afford implants.
But he say's I have an idea.
Every day several times a day just rub some toilet paper on your boobs and they will get bigger.
She says you really think so?
he say's yeah I do.
So after a few day's she comes to him and asks well do my boobs look bigger, and he say's no.
so a couple of more weeks goes by and she ask's does my boobs look bigger and he say's no.
So a couple of more weeks goes by and she ask's again do my boobs look bigger and again he said no....So she then asks well I have been rubbing this toilet on my boobs for several weeks and each time you tell me my boobs are not any bigger...he say's well keep trying....
she says well why do you think this will work...
He said well it worked on your butt didn't it?