Topic: How to pick up women
813punk's photo
Wed 01/16/08 09:03 PM
Most men think there's a magic word they can say to get a woman to talk to them. While there is no such "magic word," there are three keys to communicating with a woman that work every single time.
This is not earth-shattering stuff. What I'm about to suggest to you is a simple approach that has worked every single time I or one of my students have used it.
Here are the three simple steps to communicating with a woman:
Step 1: Observe What She Is Doing. Take the example of a woman standing behind you in line at the supermarket unloading her groceries. What is she putting on the conveyor belt? If she's behind you in line at Starbucks, what is she ordering? What is she eating?
Notice everything she's doing. Let the environment give you something to say.
Most guys think of something to say that's so random it makes absolutely no sense in a woman's mind.
Most guys think of something to say that's so random it makes absolutely no sense in a woman's mind. Women actually make fun of these guys and say, "You won't believe what he actually came over and said to me."
Step 2: Act on the Observation. In order to properly act upon the observation, you need to open her up and evoke a feeling. For instance, if a woman is ordering a double espresso, the thing to talk about is usually the first thing that comes to your mind.
A typical guy might say, "Do you like coffee?" which leads to a yes or no answer. A man who is 100 percent present will look at her and say, "Rough night last night?" or "Busy day ahead?" What you're trying to do is stay inside her head and remain in her current thought process.
It's much easier to have a conversation based upon things she's already experiencing. A woman will share something that's already going on in her head.
Another example: you're standing at a bar and see a woman ferociously texting someone while standing there by herself. You can walk over and make an assumption like "Is your friend late?" This will in turn open up a conversation based upon feelings and emotions.

Women are emotional creatures. They want to bond with you emotionally.
Women are emotional creatures. They want to bond with you emotionally. They don't want to bond with you randomly. This leads us to Step 3.
Step 3: Listen to What She Has to Say. In order to have good conversation and bond with a woman, you need to listen to what she says. If you listen to her, you will know what to say next. It's called a conversation for a reason.
A lot of men always think about what to say next, or they have a script in their head about what to say next. That's not a conversation -- that's a bad screenplay.

Mike91ZX's photo
Wed 01/16/08 09:08 PM
I don't use lines or techniques to pick up women, I've always found it easiest to just show your personality and work on your environment to make her smile.

no photo
Wed 01/16/08 10:20 PM
"Pickup Artist Secret Revealed!":
http://www.justsayhi.com/topic/show/56322

Good Day Game stuff, 813punk. A lot of guys make the mistake of opening with something dumb like "Do you like coffee?" and it just comes off as awkward and like they want something from her. The PUAs call that a "situational opener" and they just suck.

What you are describing is more like the "spontaneous opener," which is pure gold if you deliver it correctly. Max Weiss elaborates on this in his book, "The Zen of Meeting Women." As for the listening and creating an emotional connection part, his mantra is "Find the emotion, theme, feeling, or trait. Notice, admire, and relate."

It's not so easy to apply this stuff you are talking about during Night Game when you are at parties, bars, and clubs, though. The social dynamic is different there. Most of them will be doing the same thing - dancing or just talking with their friends, and it's more difficult to apply those spontaneous situational approaches to these situations without coming across as just another lame guy hitting on them.

The "opinion opener" has become the most popular standard approach in the PUA community, which involves asking the girls for their opinion on something. I personally don't think it's the best idea to do this during Night Game, though. It's better for Day Game. What I usually do is say something like "Hey whats up party people" or ANYTHING as long as I'm delivering it with a fun, positive, high-energy vibe. I love using "OMG openers" in Night Game. The most famous OMG opener is "OMG did you see that fight outside?!" but no one uses that anymore since it was televised on VH1's "The Pickup Artist" haha. I like using "OMG where did you get that shirt" better.

The mistake that vast majority of PUA newbies make is that they try to prepare themselves with ALL canned material like a script. So, yeah, people do need to LISTEN more for genuine conversation - but hone your listening skill so that you can tune into a woman's emotional state and the theme of what she's talking about with as little conversation from her side as possible. Be the guy that UNDERSTANDS and "gets it" quickly because in the beginning stages, you are going to be wanting to talk a lot more than she is, ESPECIALLY for Night Game.