A guy walked into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He put the alligator up on the bar and turned to the astonished patrons.

"I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute. He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink."

The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth. The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top its head. The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals, unscathed as promised. The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks was delivered. The man stood up again and made another offer.

''I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar.

"I'll try,'' said a small woman, ''but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."

ohhh i get it now

lol

ok u asked for it .........there is an old man and woman layin in bed the old man farts and yells touchdown the woman says what are u doin he said fart football.she says ok and farts and yells touch down tie score.the old man farts and say touchdown and the old woman farts and says touchdown tie score again ./the old man lays ther and nothing happens so the woman farts again and yells feildgoal im up three points the old man tries but nothin then he tries harder and ****s the bed and get up the woman says what is that the old man says halftime switch sides

LMAO! It's twice as funny when people say shyt like that!