Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures?
1. Your last name stays put.
2. The garage is all yours.
3. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
4. Chocolate is just another snack.
5. You can be President.
6. You can never be pregnant.
7. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
8. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
9. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
10. The world is your urinal.
11. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
12. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
13. Same work, more pay.
14. Wrinkles add character.
15. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100 .
16. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
17. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
18. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
19. One mood all the time.
20. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
21. You know stuff about tanks.
22. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
23. You can open all your own jars.
24. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
25. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
26. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
27. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
28. You almost never have strap problems in public.
29. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
30. Everything on your face stays its original color.
31. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
32. You only have to shave your face and neck.
33. You can play with toys all your life.
34. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
35. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
36. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
37. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
38. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
39. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

hahahaha!

hate to be the downer, but:

5. You can be President.
-this applies to anyone born in the United States, male or female, who is at least 35yrs old.
So it has nothing to do with gender. Seeing as many men can not, in fact, be President.

6. You can never be pregnant
- some women are infertile.

9. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
- My mechanic has never lied to me once, because if he did I would know it.
I know my car inside and out, and I can change the tires, oil, and other fluids myself.

11. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
- Never had that issue.

12. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
- right= tight, left= loose.

13. Same work, more pay.
- I get paid more then the majority of the staff at my job.

15. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100 .
- david's bridal does have $99 dress sales

18. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
- none of my shoes ever cut, mangled or gave my feet a blister.

20. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
-ditto. i hate the phone.

22. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
- 14 days in Chicago = 1 suitcase.

23. You can open all your own jars.
- So can most women. We don't really need men for this.

25. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
- never an issue for me.

33. You can play with toys all your life
- i still have my '85 nintendo.



this wasn't even funny, i'm sorry.