Topic: so i wrote a poem, that i would like critiqued... | |
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now that the deforrestation of my heart is complete.
i am ready to accept a new seedling of passion, joy and commitment. may it blossom into a giant oak of strength and care. shall it shield me from sin and loniliness as the days go by whilst the roots our relationship never yield we shall be ever blessed by the newly emblazoned colours of each passing season. han ( ecological romanticist ) |
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i read it and enjoy and appreciate
the sentiment it might benefit from a different structure something which would modify the pace of the reading but it is a very nice contribution and i hope that you will continue to write and share with all of us and, WELCOME to jsh |
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I believe that would actually be called spoken word...the meter and the form of it don't really qualify as "poetry" per se....but the thoughts are lovely....
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poetry come from the heart & soul
GREAT 1 my brother |
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