How would you know if that feeling of love is genuine? Probably most of us have gone through that deep feeling of confusion. But is there any methid of determining the real feeling of love from a pseudo one?

When you think of her and smile.

...I agree with this^^^..
You just know it from the top of you to the very bottom of you.. there is no second-guessing it.. you can check off all the boxes.. she's funny.. caring considerate. Passionate romantic..
Snappy dresser.. keeps in shape...
Makes you feel good about yourself.
.. she makes you feel good to be with her... your heart aches for her when she's not with you... you can't imagine what your life was before she was in it... and on those days when you can remember you would never want to go back to those days again...yup..

What you need to start at, is what YOU PERSONALLY mean by "genuine love."

Seriously, love might be the single most over-defined word and concept in the human experience.

So specifically, what I'm asking you to figure out is, what are you going to do or expect that is DIFFERENT from yourself, or from the other person to you, once you've decided that it IS "genuine love?"

The reason to figure that out, is that it's those behavioral details, that decide what to do to figure out if what you are feeling, or think you are seeing or hearing from the other person, is "genuine" or not.

Most people, especially younger ones, ask the question you did, because they've discovered that a person can feel extreme lust for another person, but not actually give a crap about them AS a person, and they realize that that's not likely to result in a satisfying long term relationship.

So, what's the details you are concerned about?

All those physical feelings you get for the person you love are really nice, eg the warm feeling in the heart, your inability to stop smiling, your thinking about the person all the time, but for most couples, that feeling fades.

The only type of love I trust is one that inspires me to go out of my way to consistently protect, nurture and bring joy to that special person , and when they are inspired to do the same for me.


All the fluttering hearts and swooning dont mean squat if you and that person cant be there for each other and good to each other through good and bad times.

Love is sacrifice.

Lust is smile on your face when thinking of her.

Love is sacrifice with a smile in your heart


As long as the sacrifice is not your partner

It's when your partner is your best friend and favorite person. You get that warm feeling and smile in your heart whenever you think of them. You also miss them when you can't be with them. Also the things you thought were quirky about them when you first, seem adorable. For me, when these things come together, I usually know I have lost my heart and I am in love and it's a wonderful feeling!

Was that too mushy?

You won't.
If it is genuine and you question it, distance yourself from your relationship in an attempt to look at it objectively, you'll harm your relationship.

If it is a "pseudo" form of love then it's rationalized. If you've rationalized love then you are going to rationalize any study of it in order to prove it's "real."

So, you're either going to accept it and move on, find it to be what you want it to be even if it's not, or treat it like a science project and blow everything up.


Sure. Lots. But using them tend to be hard on relationships.
At best you can go see a therapist to help you after you've killed the relationship and find out in hindsight "yep! That was real!"

This and it feels like home.

Very well said Peggy indeed love is genuine when you are ready to do everything for the one you love. Being ready to take a leap of faith in love...... even with all the doubts and fears still you have given your heart to someone hoping that everything's gonna be fine. Believing that your love for each other will keep you strong and will survive through good and bad times.

When you wronged that person so badly that you hurt yourself inside too. You can't sleep at night and your stomach aches all day because of it, knowing he's never going to forgive you.

When you can't wait to hear from him and your mind is on him all the time.