Marriage isn't so much finding the right person as being the right person.

Rightt

You could be a great person, but with the wrong partner I don't think things will last or work out. :)

Welcome to Mingle and good luck!

Love, compatibility, and good communication can give a marriage a strong foundation

well ya got that half right

Ummm....okay.

Glad to read that you think so well of yourself, for having been born the "right person." The world is always a little better when people like themselves (provided they aren't psychotic).

Don't really see how being born wonderful is a "building block," though.

I've been "the right guy" for sixty two years (so far), and since I've managed to fall for the very WRONG women, I'm very much on my own, being wonderful. So my own deduction is that good marriages are built on a foundation of BOTH people being "right" for each other.

IMO there's danger in this statement.

People could easily infer (and do if internet profiles are any indication) "being the right person" means "I have to change myself, create a facade, learn who they want me to be and be that in order to get them to marry me, I need to either manipulate myself or their perceptions of me so they see me as the right person."

Or, "I need to predefine who I want, create a character in my head of the 'right' person and then only look for someone that adheres and conforms to the idea of who I want them to be; the person that will lead to my happiness. Relationships and communication aren't a learning process, they should just click with me and what I want immediately, if they don't, then they must be the wrong person. It's not about getting to know who they are, it's about measuring them against my ideal."


It's easy to overlook the basic simple message inherent in the op statement of "it's not only about you."