Belching, I raked at my testicles. I should have showered but the
morn or next week would have to do.
My belly seemed to have this ability to lever up my vest. But hey
needs must, and maybe the charity shop will have something to
fit me.

I yawned, scratched my arse spat in the gutter, and farted.
Then furtively looked around to see if anyone had seen or heard
my ablutions. I��m good, but my work often goes unnoticed.
Anyway I needed a s**t, so I walked with small steps, buttocks
clenched as if holding a sixpence, bloody Guinness.

I made my way to Wetherspoons, to see if there were any under-
graduate waiters, wandering the tables with an unclaimed full
English. A man's gotta eat like, and I'��d just cleared my head.
Now If I could just get my hands on one of those free refill mugs
I'��m coffeed up for the day. Yeah, some like it hot, ah like it free.

R