petemcl,

I had my share of crying spells prior to the time I told my physician what was happening. Once he knew, I was put on medication that helped me greatly.

Depression among men is more common than the general public knows.

Pete,

When you learn to live your own life for yourself; your own values and joys, you will see that the putting of one foot in front of the other everyday is a miracle; mundane human behaviour becomes superhuman, when you find something bigger than yourself to live for.

Hay hang in there buddy life deals dirt to all of us. I mean sometimes I have been in the darkness and thought there was no way out and things got very tough, but eventually the ship rights itself and the light comes shinning through.Find something to make your soul at peace, religion, meditation, hiking, etc. Go out and watch other people, do the things that make you happy you deserve it. Best wishes to you.

I can relate.
I've been having panic attacks for the last 5 years.
I've had depression and PTSD since I was a young child.

Lately, the depression has been more severe.
They put me on prozac. I'm in the ER right now with adverse reactions.
Eyes, skin burning, etc.

If I can't come up with any other reason to live, I remember, my being alive will piss someone off today.

That makes getting out of bed worth it.

Oh Pete! Never, ever give up hope sweetie! There are people everywhere who can love you and care for you. You are a very kind and sweet person and you should never consider yourself of little importance to other people. Depression is a difficult thing to overcome, I know, but it can be done despite how long it takes to get through it. I could tell you some horror stories about depression but the most important thing is to tell yourself is that nothing is impossible to those who want to achieve the seemingly impossible. I believe you have what it takes deep within you to achieve that. In the meantime, know there are caring and loving people here who can and will help through the rough times. Hugs and love to you!

everyone here is so cool, thanks for the support and to anyone else reading this that feels the same, there clearly are people who understand and want to help. i wish happiness to all

I have no idea who you are, Pete. But I can say this from experience. It takes knowing everything about yourself, no matter what it is, and if need be, realizing what thoughts are the triggers, and how to circumvent them. It can be a long process for some people, but do not lose heart, for look how many have responded. As for what to do about general malaise and not seeing the besuty in this world, or something to keep you going, the hardest thing in life is realizing what is meaningful to you. For me, it's the written word in literature and fiction, no religion for it was horrendous on my spirit, and good friends. As few as I have, they are enough because I know their honesty is constant and only for my benefit. They are out there, Pete, and if need be, on places such as this. There is nothing worng with distance empathy, as I like to call it. And a little anecdote that might help with this: I once read a story in the press of a lonely little boy in England who asked for the person who got his message in a bottle to write to him and please be his friend. A little girl in France happened upon the bottle in the sand, read the message, and wrote back. They have been friends for over fifty years, Pete, and have seen each other only once. Perhaps you need a message in a bottle too, as well as coming on here. Good luck to you.

You're as worthy as anyone else. Never feel you're less of a person. I was just wondering if you'd been tested for Bipolar Disorder. Only because you mention feeling REALLY low. And when bipolar sufferers get depressed, they get more depressed, than people who don't have it. I'm no hypochondriac. Just trying to help you get to the bottom of why you get depressed. Think about what would make you happy, then go for those things, but don't do them for anyone but yourself. I used to do stuff to please my mum and my stepdad, only to find they were always trying to invade my personal space [i was about age twenty four by then], and it made me feel harangued. So I ran away, and lived in a hotel for a while. It wasn't ideal, but it was better than carrying on living with my parents, who used to be TOO controlling. And just to make sure, I told my social worker. She was treating me for a phobia I had, and was making sure I didn't harm myself. I just hope you're living for YOURSELF first, and not letting anyone try to control your choices ;)

((((Pete))))

i have my ups and downs, i'm manic depressive which i think they call bipolar nowadays. and thankyou for the flowers care bear, i shall put them in a digital vase

Where are you Ireland?; look up Chrys Muirhead in Scotland, Fife I think?