My son is now entering his "terrible" twos. I haven't researched the "sumpreme art" of disiplining a toddler but this is what I am doing....and so far it is working well.

I, myself, have never spanked my son. I am always consistant when "No" means "No". I try to allow my son to do much on his own without constant direction from my part. If he wanders toward a area he isnt suppose to be or unknown object...I first try to change his focus on an allowed object or area to play in. If this doesn't work then I redirect him by vocalizing "no, lets go this way...thank you" etc

Another method Ive found that works when leaving one activity and starting another is counting to 3. I first tell my son that playtime is almost over....or that its time to go to bed soon, so that he is aware that this change will be taking place. Then when it is time for bed etc I count to three and within that time he has to start heading in the new direction. He normally comes before 2 or he will not need me to count at all. Another thing that helps the transition of leaving the old activity is I have my son say "goodnight" to his toys or "goodbye" if its during the day. I also like to include my son in little chores that make him feel important. Such as picking up toys (which he is really good at!), help stir the salad, picking up sticks out of the yard, folding clothes (this gets interesting) etc.

Tamtrums are ignored. If he throws a fit infront of company I simply continue my conversation. Knowing tantrums dont earn attention...this usually brings blow outs to short end.

He sleeps through the night without waking or crying or wanting a drink, etc. I make a point to have an evening activity after supper. This includes a short stroll, bike ride or simply playing at his friends, or going to the park. I am convinced the fresh air before bed helps him sleep soundly.


Well I know Im not perfect, but so far this has been working for us.

Any suggestions?

WAIT TILL HE HITS 4 2 ARE NOT SO BAD BUT MAN MY 3I/2 THINKS HES THE MAN OF THE HOUSE, HE THINKS HE CAN TELL ME WHAT TO DO AND SO ON SOMETIMES I THINK HE THINKS IM HIS GIRLFRIEND LITTLE BOYS DEVELOP THERE FIRST LOVE WITH THERE MOMS AND I THINK WHEN SOMEONE TRIES TO CROSS THAT LINE THATS WHERE THE MACHO IN THEM STEPS IN!!

Find the book, 123 Magic, read it and use it! It worked like a charm with my boy. Was introduced to it by D's IEP teacher in Pre-K.

Basically a time out thing, but no explanations for them. All about learning from their actions. Still do it now. Usually, he stops the inappropriate behavior when I say, "Okay, that's ONE!"

Hugs, M

Your son sounds well adjusted, and treated with respect by his Mother...quiet, clear direction, simple reasoning, age and developmentally appropriate to him.

I imagine tantrums would be rare with your son, and from my experiences, with my children, they were accumulative frustrations, as their thought processes were more advanced than their motor skills, at various stages of their growth.

Attention seeking tantrums didn't happen, because I was mindful of what attention was usual for my children, and didn't reduce it when I have visitors..I didn't become a 'go away and play' Mum....but rather a plonk on the lap and include Mum.

When their little world did get frustrating, and they would have a 'blow out'...I had two methods, the calm and quiet observer, present and available, and sat at their level, arms open as the tirade passed...as well as the hug/restrain method...

They were rare, the tantrums that required the restrain method...I would sit my butt down on the floor, and place the child with their back to my chest, and 'bear hug' quite firmly, as the child calmed, and the tantrum had peaked, so did the strength of my 'hug' until it bacame loose arms and gentle rocking, ending in I love yous, and kisses.

My children were quite frightened by their tantrums...completely overwhelmed, and unreachable...so I would always be present as a reassuring prescence.

This worked for me and mine, but Katie, you know your little one better than any...you will know what works for him.

Ofcourse this whole system of disipline is almost completely thrown out the window when he is at "nama's & boppa's" house.


When company comes over, he is more likely to have a tantrum. He is not ignored for the company...but rather becomes the center of attention, and the object of our conversation. When its just me and him he is not likely to throw any such fits.

anyone know why he is more likely to throw a fit?

He doesnt want to share his mom with anyone.....do your friends have kids???? At 2 years old they don't really play with other kids but like to play near them....observing etc....

Kids always feel your feelings.....anxiety, stress, sadness, happiness and usually act accordingly to what you feel even when you don't realize it you are putting out those vibes.

It is a general rule that kids will always act out when you don't want them to!

whewwwwwwwww..you said tots and here i thought what did i do this time???

Midnight..sounds like ur already doing a good job...

oops..sorry ...meant twilight..

I think if you are consistent in what you do and stick to NO means NO....then it should work. All I have to say is thank goodness my children are older

Sounds like you are doing a wonderful job...keep up the good work, every year gets harder Just wait till they are teens

My friends dont have kids...but 2 are preggo!

My son has his own friend. He lives right next door and is a year older then him. They play cars together...its so cute to see them both squatting down on the "road" rug, pushing cars, and making little motor noises with their mouths.

Thanks everyone for your support, thoughts & suggestions.