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Topic: What would make a guy
Goofball73's photo
Thu 08/15/13 06:31 PM

keep wanting to come back over and over again after telling him that you are done with him?

Lets rule out desperate and low self esteem

Im curious guys?


Maybe he is deaf? Or if you wrote it out he can't read? I mean.....education these days is really in the crapper. :tongue:

Candiapples's photo
Thu 08/15/13 08:12 PM
Edited by Candiapples on Thu 08/15/13 08:45 PM




I can think of a couple of reasons...

1. They think you might have a change if heart and want to be there when you do? slaphead

or

2. They think if they bug you long and hard enough, you will eventually throw up your arms in exasperation and say..."fine, just take me already!" just to make the madness stop. And they certainly want to be there when THAT happens. whoa

I just said "long and hard" again. :laughing:




Cinderella, I have given in a few times. I know one thing is I would never bother a guy again if I knew he didnt want me. So what would make anyone want to do that?


Just that, because you have "given in a few times".

I have to agree with the others who have said this is the problem. I would consider sleeping with someone you aren't into a problem on more levels than...you've totally lead the man on. sad2

I haven' told the whole story here but I let him back in after discussing with him why I called it quits. He did try to change things but fell back into his old ways. I feel like I was given false hope.
I don't want to change anyone..that was his decision to do when I told him it wasn't working

Candiapples's photo
Thu 08/15/13 08:15 PM



sweetestgirl called it! its the "No" sometimes means yes scenario.You have rewarded him for his efforts much like a mouse going down the same corridor in a maze looking for cheese. you boundary's are simple not firm. grade 1,page 1 psychology. so what are you doing later..nevermind, i"ll just bring flowers:thumbsup: :laughing:

Lol firm has to mean never..I have known him for three years now. I have stopped talking to him for months at a time..once it was for eight months..its a strange situation I know. I was hoping he would have changed but thats another story altogether..
oh i get itthink so you want what you want when you want it but the "boy" cant handle it, "The pricks in the air and the brains are in the ground" he probes in and we probe the info outslaphead lol. OK, this is how you fix em! The best way to fix a chasing man is chase the man. bring him in like a prisoner right after sex just be a total biotch, give him the 20 questions routine,start pulling the jealousy trip take his money,cut him down then watch him run...then call him a few days later and tell him "I guess i don't make a very good girlfriend and say i'd rather make 5 guys really happy than one guy miserable ...and laugh it off with him. now the grounds will be set for Booty calls from you..this experience should ground him keeping his manners in check and respecting your boundaries:thumbsup: or you tell him to respect your boundaries, if he cant do that then firm boundaries would mean "never again but you have unhealthy boundaries and thats why he doesn't respect yours. There are three types of boundaries: collapsed,firm and rigid, most people with collapsed boundaries get walked on over and over until they have had enough then often go to rigid boundaries and let nobody in for a while..bouncing back and forth. thats what i see here,shutting him out for three months and then 8 months...there may be some people in your life that you may need to be rigid with, but that shouldn't be often,but he may be one of these people. firm boundaries are healthy boundaries..go to a work shop on boundaries,if you want to hear it twiceflowerforyou its easy and will change your life.:wink: waving

laugh Yes that will work

Candiapples's photo
Thu 08/15/13 08:18 PM
Edited by Candiapples on Thu 08/15/13 08:25 PM
[

Cinderella, I have given in a few times. I know one thing is I would never bother a guy again if I knew he didnt want me. So what would make anyone want to do that?


Just that, because you have "given in a few times".


I just figured out that by "given in a few times"...you don't mean you went on dates with him do you?

I have to agree with the others who have said this is the problem. I would consider sleeping with someone you aren't into a problem on more levels than...you've totally lead the man on. sad2


Yes we did go out and hung out at my place and his. We also took a 7 day trip togethe

1Cynderella's photo
Thu 08/15/13 09:09 PM

[

Cinderella, I have given in a few times. I know one thing is I would never bother a guy again if I knew he didnt want me. So what would make anyone want to do that?


Just that, because you have "given in a few times".


I just figured out that by "given in a few times"...you don't mean you went on dates with him do you?

I have to agree with the others who have said this is the problem. I would consider sleeping with someone you aren't into a problem on more levels than...you've totally lead the man on. sad2


Yes we did go out and hung out at my place and his. We also took a 7 day trip togethe


laugh That's what I get for second guessing things. I had started to think that by "giving in" you meant giving it up. slaphead

Simonedemidova's photo
Fri 08/16/13 02:00 PM
A Hopeless man will hold onto whatever he can. He goes blind and deaf and is trapped in a box of his own imagination.

whattheheywastaken's photo
Fri 08/16/13 02:21 PM

A Hopeless man will hold onto whatever he can. He goes blind and deaf and is trapped in a box of his own imagination.


The Doctor: I am definitely a madman with a box!

Candiapples's photo
Fri 08/16/13 04:28 PM


[

Cinderella, I have given in a few times. I know one thing is I would never bother a guy again if I knew he didnt want me. So what would make anyone want to do that?


Just that, because you have "given in a few times".


I just figured out that by "given in a few times"...you don't mean you went on dates with him do you?

I have to agree with the others who have said this is the problem. I would consider sleeping with someone you aren't into a problem on more levels than...you've totally lead the man on. sad2


Yes we did go out and hung out at my place and his. We also took a 7 day trip togethe


laugh That's what I get for second guessing things. I had started to think that by "giving in" you meant giving it up. slaphead

:smile:

Candiapples's photo
Fri 08/16/13 04:32 PM


A Hopeless man will hold onto whatever he can. He goes blind and deaf and is trapped in a box of his own imagination.


The Doctor: I am definitely a madman with a box!

:smile: Theres not much more I can do but just ignore him..I enem tried blocking him on my anroid ph but apparently that feature doesn't work sad2

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