On occasion, I remember things from my past. It is not that I live in the past. I actually would like to run from parts of my past, including the person I am still legally bound to...


I have had unusual things happen to me. I say happen, because in many cases, I am not a participant in the social activities. I come and go as I please, and often do things alone, or rather, I do things as a single parent.


It was on a day like this that I decided to go to the beach. I rarely go, but my daughter was very young and enjoyed the water and sand. I was in pretty good shape then. I remember my bikini because I picked it out to wear for my boyfriend. He did not like the colors red, black or patterns. the suit must be of a solid color. It was not easy, but I finally found a navy bikini at Target.


It was a beautiful day. Very warm, which it must be in order for me to remove my t-shirt and shorts. I lay on my stomach and watched my daughter play in the sand. I was lost in a daydream when a younger man sat down next to me. Tall and thin with blond hair boldly sitting next to me.


I am very particular about who I invite into my personal space. This blond just invaded my private bubble.


I might have thought he was attractive or charming, if I was not already seeing somebody. I might have enjoyed the attention if I had not spoiled it for myself with some blind loyalty.


He asked me if I would rub some oil on his shoulders. I thought to myself, what a strange request. I have never had a complete stranger request such a thing. Being that odd things do happen to me, and being that not a lot shocks me, I did as he requested. As if I was not myself, I rubbed his tan shoulders and back. I remember him telling me it felt good...


I don't remember much after that. I did leave shortly after and I did avoid that beach the rest of the summer. I had scolded myself for being a coward.


When I go to the beach these days, I wonder if I will have such an opportunity again. To rub coconut scented oil onto tanned shoulders and back.