The things I tell my heart aren't true
I place my feet on muddy grounds in search of anew;
Not of the desolate dark where there is no solace,
Not the dismal caverns in which the sun never hits.
I dreamt of a place in my sadness
Sometimes I feel the sand beneath my feet, or a grassy meadow, maybe a
place I never knew.
I find there is no place that stops the darkness from getting through.
The grit, the sound, the pounding of the wind.
That echoes of the hollow always in view. I stand, I fall, and I
scrape my knees and bruise my call in hopes that I will learn to
crawl.
Out of the hole that is so deep, out of the hole that covers me.
The tomb is deep I can not see for I hide my shame behind my need,
I wear my guilt upon my sleeve I hide the blood that seeps with in me.
I ask the question,
why does it have to be me-.... again I am looking at me,
who hides behind scars and scrapes for I know I can't erase,
the plague of life, The seed of death I look for a savior a promise a rest.
For my pillow is heavy, my rest disturb by my dream of life, clarity
and focus not on me but what I fear and what I dare.
To come into the calm, to come out of the storm, wring my hair and dry
my burden.
Sit on my chair and listen to the ticks and tock of the turbulent
shock at the blessing of light, it shines whether or not.
The light still shines and I am still here to listen to the howling
wind that wishes to beckon me again.
All so dreary, all to cold the battle rages on and I am forewarned
that what I seek is not in vain, that it lies not in the storm only in
the break, that I shall take my stay and rest, for another day is on
it's way.
That I may sleep or lie awake perhaps dream that I am safe. In the
arms of a warm embrace. The kisses of the sun upon my face, the kisses
of love written in a place where my heart may not fear to dream again.
So I say to self, I will pray that I am not right and I am not wrong,
to keep my eyes on the truth to hold no pride to throw no stones.
I do not want to die holding on to the lie,
I do not want to die living a lie!
The only way I can survive the only way out is to cry aloud "what is
wrong with this place" is it only for the naked eye?
To see the truth where it lurks,
to see the truth no matter where it hurts!
I lie on my pillow at night I close my eyes daring not to cry.
I lie on my pillow now wide-eyed tears clogging my throat and my mind.
The desperate need to try and stay alive
for something so easy and not just for the masterminds,
but for simple minds and hearts can find.
The true bread, the light, the Son, the Father and water to feed the hunger!
By the by Dare I ever---

nicely done...

'packs quite a punch'

Really good...

Only one comment as I may have completely missed the big picture.
Q1: Is it possible to space it out?

Keep up the great work.

Outstanding!...Gifted!...A deliciously filling read!

that is something else that just the words love it

Goodness thanks I hope it moved you!

Thank you writing is truly therapeutic ^__^ again thank you for taking the time out...so glad you enjoyed it!

Thank you

how could it not?

(just stopped to enjoy this again)

Sweet ^__^ you are too kind!

Gripping!

A smashing write!

A read all seeking the walk should view.

Thank you *HUGE SMILE*..."perceptive" Wow thank you for noticing!

this word play is deep...certainly turning ink to elixir.