Ahhh, Joyce, I just don't know.

Was dating a guy for a short time. Enjoyed being around him, but said sparks were not there. He gave me the 'I'm not that into you' talk before I had it with him. I am so used to an initial something (spark, connection, whatever) and getting burned, I figured I would give it time, but I think I was spinning my wheels.

It comes down to figuring out if this guy is worth your time. I know I am not ready to settle down or even settle in any way, but I think I want a someone special in my life. Did that make any sense?

I think I need a drink or chocolate! Or both!

That fwb is such crap. The only one getting the benefit is usually the one using say you. I am not being mean just honest.

Someone always gets hurt when you have a friend with benefits.........one always begins to feel more than the other.............then you lose a friend............been there done that...........and at this point will say I don't think I will do it again.

Joyce

I'm not picking on you but your going through the "I want to have My Cake and eat it Too" syndrome.

I'm a bit of a believer in celibacy I guess consider me old fashioned does this new gentlemen your currently showing interest in know you have a friends with benefits thing???

if he finds out one way or another it could come back to haunt You.

in my case I have more feelings for him and would love it to turn into more, however it will never. he knows how i feel and he knows that i do want o find the one person i can say "i love you" to.
maybe it is having my cake and eating it to, but i feel it is better than dating to find the right person and sleeping with multiple partners.

joyce baby all that lingerie i bought you is for nothin.? and yur seein someone else im devastated.!!! lol

OMG---
i am not seeing someone else!!
I am dating like everyone on here!
i am looking for that right special person who wants me and wants to grow old with just me!!!

hi joyce!

i agree that you need to work on the "are we exclusive?" issue first. i have seen and experienced wonderful loves that grew stronger - much stronger over time...i don't know if they can grow like that in a non-exclusive mode...

personally i always needed to go exclusive to take the relationship to the next level - so i never dated multiple women for very long and only had one intimate partner at a time...

certainly your friend will understand if you need to take a break from him to pursue a new love interest and see how far it goes - so that is what i would suggest if you really want to see how deeply you will be able to feel for one another.

here's hoping that you soon find the one you can turn into jelly and who will drive you crazy also always!

nujoyce,

This is what I recommend. (If anyone also posted the same advice, apologize for my lack of originality!)

1.Decide. Do you want to give this new relationship a decent shot? If the answer is yes, then follow below.
2. Talk to your friend w/ fringe benefits. Explained to him that you do not know where this new relationship may or may not end, but you need to end the fringe benefits (at least for now). If the new relationship doesn't work. No harm; no foul. You gave it your best. You may be able to maintain friendship your friend, but it may be awkward. If the friendship means alot to you, give it time. It takes time to establish new boundaries.
3. Give the new relationship some time, but be honest w/ yourself.

Take Care & Good Luck