Father's Day is all about fun and celebrations, therefore jokes and good humor should always be included in the celebrations so that it becomes easier to see that lovely smile on your Father's face. There are various books available which provide you with a collection of Father's Day jokes to choose from. You can also make personalized jokes and read them out to your father or include them in the card that you are gifting him. Always make sure that the jokes that you have chosen depicts a father - child bonding in some form. Here is a list of jokes that you can choose from to include in your Father's Day celebrations
The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present. "Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?" Five small voices answered in unison, "Okay, dad, you get the toy."
In 1900, if a father put a roof over his family's head, he was a success. Today, it takes a roof, deck, pool, and a 4-car garage. And that's just the vacation home.
One time my kids wanted to surprise me with a good breakfast in bed on Father's Day. They put a cot in the kitchen.
One evening, while sitting around the dinner table, a little girl looked up and asked her father, "Daddy, you're the boss, right?" Her father was very pleased by this and replied, "Yes." Then, the little girl continued, "That's because mommy put you in charge, right?"
If the relationship of father to son could really be reduced to biology, the whole earth would blaze with the glory of fathers and sons.
"Daddy, Daddy, can I have another glass of water please?" "But I've given you 10 glasses of water already!" "Yes, but the bedroom is still on fire!"
In 1900, fathers and sons would have heart-to-heart conversations while fishing in a stream. Today, fathers pluck the headphones off their sons' ears and shout, "When do you have a minute?"
In 1900, fathers passed on clothing to their sons. Today, kids wouldn't touch dad's clothes if they were sliding naked down an icicle.
After the church service a little boy told the pastor, "When I grow up, I'm going to give you some money." "Well, thank you," the pastor replied, "but why?" "Because my daddy says you're one of the poorest preachers we've ever had."
If you think about it, Adam had more trouble than any of the rest of us buying his father a gift for Father's Day. I mean, what do you get somebody who's Everything?
http://www.indobase.com/fathersday/fathers-day-humour.html

"By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong."

"I have always had the feeling I could do anything and my dad told me I could. I was in college before I found out he might be wrong."

"It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was."

"I've had a hard life, but my hardships are nothing against the hardships that my father went through in order to get me to where I started."

"Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected."

My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys."

"A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again."

"My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it."

Happy Father's Day

i'm planning on knocking up some hooker so i'll have a reason to celebrate fathers day

~Happy Fathers Day~
to all of the "babies daddies".



Dont forget to send your child support!

Diapers arent free, ya know?

See you on the "Jerry Springer Show".

Happy Father's Day, Dad. I miss you

the tests already proved i am not the father!!!

Yeah, I remember that.....

i was already having a bad day

Im thinkin that the thought of THIS is whats causing your "bad day".

a mans gotta do what a mans gotta do

YOU GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOYFRIENDDDDDDDDDD!

Happy Father's Day!

Mental Fluorosis

When I was in school, my teachers would all chip in and send a gift basket of designer condoms to Daddy on every Fathers' Day, for all 28 years of my schooling (grade 1 to highschool, then I dropped out in grade ten. I just simply had had enough of that BS.)