Community > Parenting Talk

Topic: For single parents.
jaded72 Joined Tue 12/06/11 Posts: 1456	Fri 06/01/12 09:25 PM
Different kids need different things. My son is a cuddler. Always has been. When we brought him home from the hospital he would only sleep ON someone - he needed body heat and heart beat to create a safe place for him. He's 6, now, and loves to jump in bed with us in the morning for a cuddle. As he gets older, I can still imagine him needing that time and reassurance. Why wouldn't I give it to him? It also sounds like your daughter has special circumstances (which I can identify with). If she was mine, I would allow her to seek comfort with me as well. Trust your own instincts. you know your own child better than any of us, here. :)

Ladywind7 Joined Sun 04/08/12 Posts: 7833	Fri 06/01/12 10:45 PM
Thanks jaded. What made me bring up the topic was a comment said to me insisting she was too old. But like you said I am the parent and I know her best.

oldhippie1952 Joined Mon 03/14/11 Posts: 22693	Fri 06/01/12 10:52 PM
Let her have her innocence for a while longer, it hurts nothing. I hated telling my son, and then my daughter, when they turned 8 there was not any Santa Claus. I only did so because I knew the other kids would make fun of them for not knowing. They grow up too fast without our help.

dreamygirl75 Joined Sun 10/09/11 Posts: 1	Wed 07/25/12 04:28 AM
hello my daughter is 6 y old and she sleeps with me ...she explains that like she is afraid of the dark,but never was,it started after my ex and i divorced so i guess it has to do something with pls dont u leave me alone like my father did...try to talk with her and all is going to be fine,it takes time

Ladywind7 Joined Sun 04/08/12 Posts: 7833	Wed 07/25/12 04:49 AM
Thanks. She sleeps in her own bed once again so she is obviously feeling safer :-)

Scotti71 Joined Fri 07/13/12 Posts: 173	Wed 07/25/12 06:28 AM Edited by Scotti71 on Wed 07/25/12 06:33 AM
Thanks. She sleeps in her own bed once again so she is obviously feeling safer :-) I think its a reassurance thing.She feels nice and safe with you so that subconsciously follows on when she gets into your bed in the middle of the night.Shes at that age of growing up into a teen,but also still a child as well so shes sort of caught in the middle.Shes most probably got a raft of emotions going on inside her so she seeks comfort from you.It must be hard for her not having a dad so shes only got you to turn too.Shes not to old and she will grow out it.Its just lucky you got a big bed!

PacificStar48 Joined Tue 10/02/07 Posts: 13764	Thu 07/26/12 11:36 PM
I think there are times regardless of age that it should be reasonable for family members to sleep in/on the same bed. Sometimes it is for comfort and security and other times it is just a matter of necessity when a big family gathers or doubles up as economic hardships, or even catestrophic illness or trauma are weathered. Sleeping with someone can sometimes feel like all elbows and knees when exhausted adults try to sleep "around" a child but it is one of the sweet sacrifices we remember not for the poor quality sleep but for those precious moments where we are still our kids comfort and safe place. It can be a real "bonding" experience to relax and chat as we wind down to go to sleep or just snuggle and read, watch tv, or listen to music and nap on an occasional casual time. I highly recommend it if you hope to get through the teens and twenty's with your child still one of your best friends.

Ladywind7 Joined Sun 04/08/12 Posts: 7833	Thu 07/26/12 11:46 PM
I really appreciate all the affirmations given Thanks.

directv Joined Fri 08/31/12 Posts: 1	Fri 08/31/12 08:32 PM
my sons tried sleeping in my room. i started sleeping nude so now he is happy sleeping in the closet.

Ladywind7 Joined Sun 04/08/12 Posts: 7833	Fri 08/31/12 08:36 PM
my sons tried sleeping in my room. i started sleeping nude so now he is happy sleeping in the closet. OK??? Do you care to elaborate?

Scotti71 Joined Fri 07/13/12 Posts: 173	Sat 09/01/12 04:08 AM
Well those unicorns, teddies, teletubbies, barnies, baby bops etc need somewhere to sleep ;-) Please dont tell me her first word was "baby-bop"-if it was,you got problems ahead of you girl!!

Ladywind7 Joined Sun 04/08/12 Posts: 7833	Sat 09/01/12 05:36 AM
Well those unicorns, teddies, teletubbies, barnies, baby bops etc need somewhere to sleep ;-) Please dont tell me her first word was "baby-bop"-if it was,you got problems ahead of you girl!! STHU, her first word was babybop!

Ruth34611 Joined Sat 08/02/08 Posts: 32402	Sat 09/01/12 07:31 AM
My 13 year old daughter still wants to sleep in my bed. Not much during summer months though..I do not have an issue with her doing so, although last night I woke up to her punching me lol. She was dreaming. Any how do you other singles allow this or not? I have about 12 years and 8 months to come up with that answer, thank god! I think when we get there, it will be more about morals training for her. I don't think my daughter would be taught well to jump into bed with any man at the first sign of trouble and by age 13, I'm supposed to be teaching her to be a dignified lady so... Yea, she'll probably make me a grandfather by then... Who am I kidding?

Ruth34611 Joined Sat 08/02/08 Posts: 32402	Sat 09/01/12 07:33 AM
my sons tried sleeping in my room. i started sleeping nude so now he is happy sleeping in the closet. OK??? Do you care to elaborate? I'm hoping that was a joke. Either way, it's not really funny.

flipover5 Joined Sun 09/02/12 Posts: 2	Sat 09/08/12 03:59 PM
ive just became singal father of 3 has any one found it hard at the start and did get easier

Ladywind7 Joined Sun 04/08/12 Posts: 7833	Sat 09/08/12 10:23 PM
ive just became singal father of 3 has any one found it hard at the start and did get easier You take one day at a time. Remember you need to look after you, for you & for the children. Advice is always great in this forum, so ask away

ghtallen Joined Sat 09/08/12 Posts: 18	Sat 09/08/12 11:30 PM
ive just became singal father of 3 has any one found it hard at the start and did get easier I understand how it feels, I'm a single father of 2. Some days it's the most trying, overwhelming, tiring responsibility to ever try your patience.....then they say " I'm so glad your my dad, I love you". and it all makes sense. Their is no other life i would rather live than this.....good days and bad. They are worth every sacrifice you'll make, and your worth every hug and kiss because of it.

ghtallen Joined Sat 09/08/12 Posts: 18	Sat 09/08/12 11:38 PM
ive just became singal father of 3 has any one found it hard at the start and did get easier I understand how it feels, I'm a single father of 2. Some days it's the most trying, overwhelming, tiring responsibility to ever try your patience.....then they say " I'm so glad your my dad, I love you". and it all makes sense. Their is no other life i would rather live than this.....good days and bad. They are worth every sacrifice you'll make, and your worth every hug and kiss because of it. Then one of them turn 15 and manages to push you to limits that shouldn't be possible and you realize that it could be a few years before they truly understand the meaning behind our actions even after trying to explain why........just like we did to ours.

roses282624 Joined Sun 09/09/12 Posts: 1	Sun 09/09/12 07:39 PM
I have 3 girls 5 and under and they all usually end up in bed with me.. i dont see anything wrong with it if they want to be close to me now.. sometimes they say it was nightmares and sometimes they say they just wanted me.. and there are some nights they will stay in their own bed..

Hikerjohn Joined Sun 08/19/12 Posts: 1028	Wed 09/12/12 11:08 AM
Let her have her innocence for a while longer, it hurts nothing. I hated telling my son, and then my daughter, when they turned 8 there was not any Santa Claus. I only did so because I knew the other kids would make fun of them for not knowing. They grow up too fast without our help. What!!!!!! there is no Santa? Lady wind. Your soo caring and loving. Your daughter is in great hands.