I am writing this more to put my thoughts somewhere and get them in line more than seeking prayers or well wishes I suppose. I've actually talked about it some with one person here, and she encouraged me to post about it before, but it is my nature to keep to myself any sort of tragedy or frustration, still after today I suppose I just need to relent on it, so here goes...

A friend of mine, my best friend we might as well say, was critically burned over 95% of her body several days ago. Since that time she has been on life support and artificial breathing machines. The person I have loved and cared about and known for years, is just a shell of the beautiful vibrant woman she once was. The doctors originally gave her no chance of survival after this event, despite that, she has been pulling through and in fact has seen some slight improvement. That being said, today she took a major turn for the worst, and now her vitals which have been showing some improvement, have plummeted. I am writing this with nothing but fear and loss in my heart, full of the knowledge that even if she pulls through, even harder battles and nightmares are yet to come.

She is not originally from the US, but from Romania, and much of her family is still overseas. What family she does have here has been intolerant and cruel towards her due to her desire to educate herself and have a career... at times it felt like I was her only family, that and the few other people she has befriended over the years and have grown to love and care for her as I have.

I've been going through a very emotional roller-coaster ever since this all began, and been even more withdrawn than I normally am. I've spent several days in the burn unit with her, and if anyone has even spent anytime in one, they can attest to how horrible and upsetting it is. The sounds and images alone run through my mind sometimes it feels nonstop, and that is without the knowledge someone important to me is going through this exact same horror.

I dunno, maybe I am just venting here because I am sick of sitting by myself letting it eat and gnaw at me. I am sitting here feeling helpless and wanting to do something, and knowing there is nothing I can do but wait and see what happens. I am not good at that... I never have been good at waiting to see what happens.

So anyway, thanks for reading. Again, not asking for anything, although prayers for her recovery and well being are always welcome. I just don't want her to suffer and hurt anymore... I want her to have peace and not go through this hell.

I just want/need to put my thoughts somewhere besides my head tonight.

hopefully you will take comfort in knowing that you are doing exactly what you should be doing. being there for her in her time of need. the doctors and nurses at the burn unit are doing everything they can. i can't give you hope that she will recover and eventually live long enough to heal from this. you can give yourself the hope that whatever happens from this point on you will be there to handle her needs. to sit with her or to make arrangements, you are there, ready willing and able. may the strength you need, to accomplish what you need to, be with you. godspeed my friend

First of all....(((hugs)))

It is good to get your thoughts in perspective, and writing them down is an excellent way of doing so, as well as being able to lighten the load somewhat.

Kia Kaha!!<<----<<<which in my language means "stay strong"

((more hugs)) because you can never have enough of those at times like these.

I could never say it as eloquently as ESE, so I'll simply say "Amen to that" and send prayers your way.

I second that!Prayers and 's sent her way.

I know this is not fully correct, but Kia ora (god I hope that is thank you). It does lighten the load in a manner of speaking.

Anyway, thank you everybody and anybody. I really do appreciate it.

That's terrible, it's the sad reality that bad things sometimes happen to good people. You are a good friend to her. As for her condition, people make miraculous recoveries every day. Never give up hope! I wish you both the very best.

Perfect response you wise old ruru (owl) you...and you're most welcome

Kartagane, my heart goes out to you. And Kahurangi, you speak a language in which each expression resonates with a the name of a new creation of Kaluha coctails, or with beconing one to take a hot coconut oil massage on some magical beach of golden-clear sand, with wind-torn coconut trees swaying over blue lagoons.

Whereas here in Canada we have La Goons (Canada geese.)

Ataahua (beautiful) Wux

And i'm sure La Goons cook up just as well in a hangi as they do anywhere else

She has my prayers for a pain free recovery, my heart goes out to her.

Maybe the owl needs to come down. Everyone keeps thinking I am wise because of it. I just happen to love owls.

Thank you all for the responses. I do appreciate it.

You're a good friend kart, prayers your way for her and you.

What??...who will keep all the mice and other rodents at bay?

Besides...i rather suspect you're something of a hoot...even though you don't feel like it at the moment

Hugs and prayers to the both of you.. You are a terrific friend, to be with her as she struggles... and you are right, if she survives she will have many yrs of recovery....wishing her the best...

Just a simple update.

My dear friend, Ileana Achim, a woman I loved and cherished as both a friend, and one of the most sweetest and honest souls I have ever known, passed away this morning.

I was able to hold her hand, and tell her what was in my heart, and just hope she heard me. She will be missed more than I can ever put into words.

Thank you for your kind words, it means more to me than words can say. I truly appreciate it.

(((Kartagane)))

And if you feel up to it...would you have a pic of her?? I would like to know what she was like if that doesn't make you feel too sad or uncomfortable.

I am sorry for you loss Kartagane....Here is one of my favorite quotes...

"Friendship does not end with death, it is eternal."

Very sorry for your loss