I get so frustrated. With my bipolar, I do everything I can western medicine wise that is recommended and I do so much that my naturopath cousin recommends that is non-harmful and I do my best to live a relaxing life. Listening to peaceful music, aromatherapy, etc.

I have on friend with MS and there is so much he could be doing for himself and he refuses. He wants to hang on to being angry and bitter for dear life.

What is it that makes some people like me want to get better and other people want to just wallow? I mean I think it's something deeper than depression. Like it's a personality trait or something.

I also meet other bipolars who are not as well controlled as I am. And they always want to know what MEDS I take. Well you can pop pills all day but if you are doing nothing else to balance out your life, they can only do so much.

As I said, I do yoga and dancing and other exercise that I ENJOY that I think is fun. I never worry if the tape says to go left and I go right, etc. As one of the guys on here who is an instructor often says, you need to have fun exercising.

But do you think it's an ingrained personality trait that some people like me pursue getting healthier and feeling better and other people don't?

Good question! I have a nephew who has been overweight all of his life. Now it is to the point that he is obese and recently was asked to pay for an extra seat on an airplane because it. I can't undestand for the life of me what is it that he gains from being that way. I can understand being lazy or unmotivated as far as exercising goes but he doesn't try to cut back on food or try to eat healthy. It looks like the only thing that will get him to do something about it is a health scare.

I on the other hand am pretty fit for my age and am constantly looking to improve by whatching what I eat, drink and exercising constantly. I just don't get it! When ever someone mentions his weight he makes a joke out of it. I think it's a coping mechanism but then again I also think it's pure laziness alonge with food addition.

I don't know how to approach this without making him feel bad. I sent him an inspirational documentary to view called "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead" but haven't heard anything back. I don't know...just venting.

So I understand what you mean.

Kic Thank you for replying! You are right about it should have been adressed in childhood which it had been by almost everyone. Also, a couple of years back I lovenly seriously asked him, is there anything I can do to help him with this? I told him I love him and want to see him around in the future.. I would fly to him and start exercising with him if he needed that extra encouragement. He then replied with thanks and appreciation and he'd recently weighed himself and when he almost reached the 400 lb mark, he knew it meant death.

He then started walking daily and lost several lbs but soon after stopped. After my mom (his Grandmother) passed , he wrote down that the weight is comming off as if to tell her that in spirit. She had been trying to get him to loose weight for years. However, since then he has gained.

Anyway, it doesn't seem that he want to loose for himself and that's really my whole concern. I don't understand how to get him to realize that he must care for himself better. He just doesen't want to open up and talk about it. I just don't know :(

But like you said, I guess if someone in which he could relate to that was very overweight would be more of an inspiration. When I saw the documentary, about a guy who was very much over weight and lost it by drinking nothing but raw fruits and veggies, then walking and eventually able to run and do more exercise, I though maybe he could relate to it. It was very encouraging.

I appreciate any help.