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| Topic: Not wanting to explain | |
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Most of you who are my friends know I had to have an emergency hysterectomy or bleed to death last year. I keep encountering guys who feel it is their business to demand to know why I can't have children and go into that crappola about god and the right doctor until I say I had a hysterectomy and then they go off on how doctors just do that for the money, blah blah. Why did I let them ruin my body? I just want to tell them to F themselves. I don't know what a good response is. I feel like maybe I should just say Hell to the no on having kids and offer no explanation. I mean I never did want kids in the first place. Should I just stand strong like Lex and say NO KIDS EVER EVER EVER and not even bring up whether or not I can't have them.
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You could tell them that you used to be a guy. Chances are they'd quickly run away and you wouldn't have to explain anything.
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If you ever want kids, you can always adopt. There's nothing wrong with not wanting kids either though. F**k what anyone thinks, what do you want, and what makes you happy?
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Most of you who are my friends know I had to have an emergency hysterectomy or bleed to death last year. I keep encountering guys who feel it is their business to demand to know why I can't have children and go into that crappola about god and the right doctor until I say I had a hysterectomy and then they go off on how doctors just do that for the money, blah blah. Why did I let them ruin my body? I just want to tell them to F themselves. I don't know what a good response is. I feel like maybe I should just say Hell to the no on having kids and offer no explanation. I mean I never did want kids in the first place. Should I just stand strong like Lex and say NO KIDS EVER EVER EVER and not even bring up whether or not I can't have them. I would advise you to be aware of one thing -- taking the adamant "No kids" stance has basically made me a pariah insofar as finding any actual dating prospects is concerned. The "No kids" qualifier is more damning than saying "I killed the Lindbergh baby" or "I'm the reason Chernobyl went bad" or whatever. It may be different for a woman; I don't really know. Just understand that you are going to dissuade a lot of people who can't function outside the repro-box. I had to figure this all out, and it took awhile. And I realized that, for me anyway, it's more important for me to live a childfree life than it is to be with someone. Your mileage may vary.... |
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Most of you who are my friends know I had to have an emergency hysterectomy or bleed to death last year. I keep encountering guys who feel it is their business to demand to know why I can't have children and go into that crappola about god and the right doctor until I say I had a hysterectomy and then they go off on how doctors just do that for the money, blah blah. Why did I let them ruin my body? I just want to tell them to F themselves. I don't know what a good response is. I feel like maybe I should just say Hell to the no on having kids and offer no explanation. I mean I never did want kids in the first place. Should I just stand strong like Lex and say NO KIDS EVER EVER EVER and not even bring up whether or not I can't have them. I would advise you to be aware of one thing -- taking the adamant "No kids" stance has basically made me a pariah insofar as finding any actual dating prospects is concerned. The "No kids" qualifier is more damning than saying "I killed the Lindbergh baby" or "I'm the reason Chernobyl went bad" or whatever. It may be different for a woman; I don't really know. Just understand that you are going to dissuade a lot of people who can't function outside the repro-box. I had to figure this all out, and it took awhile. And I realized that, for me anyway, it's more important for me to live a childfree life than it is to be with someone. Your mileage may vary.... They say they are cool with it initially but then biology kicks and they decide their DNA IS SOOOOOOOOOOO SPECIAL that of course I will change my stance. It is the same thing as Ya I am your friend friend and then he changes his mind to I was your friend friend and hoping I could change your mind and make you date me later. |
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I don't think their opinion should matter in the least. If it does matter, it's an inside job, your inside job. Acceptance of the loss of choice over whether or not you can have kids by itself is difficult. If someone wants to add to it by condemning you for it, they aren't worth keeping in your life.
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