A lady who gets it...how awesome are you? I too grew up being abused by my mother, but as I grew, I realized more and more that the alcohol abuse and the physical abuse she endured was what caused her to lash out at me. I was happy to take it to keep my little brothers safe. But in the end, I gained most of my strength from these events and although I wish it hadn't happened, it has made me a very strong woman. THIS is exactly what I meant...the good, the bad, and the ugly determine the person that we become.

Had to think if I wanted to write about any of this here.

Who I am today is also because of my family, as small as it is. Because of my mother and all she had to deal with, from an abusive husband and father to working multiple jobs just to raise me and my sister. She spent more time falling behind it seems than getting ahead, just because of the way the workplace treated women at the time. She took a lot of abuse both physical and mentally, but did what she had to to get us through life safely. My grandmother helped her out a lot and took care of me while she worked, and because of all that, despite things being difficult sometimes, I never really lacked for anything I can honestly say. But growing up in it, it showed me the world from her point of view and made me adamant to become the exact opposite of the monstrous leech my father was and fill me with loathing for those like him.

Of course now my family is virtually non-existent which sometimes is depressing, but it did instill in me a great appreciation for them and envy for those that have large families.

A beautiful OP and an even more beautiful thread MisKIm...We ARE them, but also and just as deep, they ARE us!!

The question of who one is, is not grammatically correct, for it assumes the answer is absolute, when it is relative. It is one of those common constructions that become accepted because people generally do not think in terms of meaning.

Who I am to the postman, is just another customer.
Who I am to my son, is his only parent who is there.

Who I am to my boss is the best hone operator he has.

What I am, is absolute.

The episode of Bab 5 and Mr. Sabastian, although very nice, was technically in error.

This actually made me cry a bit. You are so right.

Kim, people are over-analyzing this. I think it's a beautiful thread. Thanks for making it for us this morning.

The question is actually on the same lines as the Zen question, what is the sound of one hand clapping.

This is why I hardly ever make threads anymore.

This is exactly what I was looking for. That's because the transition from your question to your OP meant I had to make a lot of assumptions about a person I don't really know. In other words, to get your meaning as it pertains to you, I needed something concrete rather than guesswork.

As a general overarching theme....yes, it makes sense, and is applicable to any one of us. But I really needed a perspective to fully understand how it was meant to depict you.


I am a sponge. I absorb everything. I leak when I get too full. If I am squeezed, someone will likely become all wet. I appear to be full of holes, perhaps a bit worn, but I never fall apart. No matter what I am put through, I eventually return to my original shape. Most of all, I am set aside until needed.

I could probably do better than that, but it's the best I could do on short notice. I'm sure plenty will mistake my meaning.

this actually makes sense.
the people around you,
or lack thereof,
have a tremendous effect on your life.
if you say they don't,
you're a liar.
go take a simple sociology course.
[*cough. cough.*
for those who said we're not allowed to blame problems on society.
*cough. cough.*]

Or take a course on language in case one does not see that relation to self is inadmissible.

The part is not different from the whole, when each is a member of a class by the same definition.

Try some buttermilk for that cough.

You misunderstand, you stand between the beauty and the beast. You were not the target, I was.

how class mechanics applies to reasoning is not generally taught.

John,

I mean in this in the most respectful way possible.

Sometimes your posts make me want to hit you in the head with a 2x4.

And you get a great big hug Ruth

Deleted because it doesn't seem necessary anymore.

my cough's fine.
thanks.

we do?

BTW....I aced out of ALL...ALL....ALL...reading and writing college courses and took three extra, anyway, simply because I enjoy it. I think some need to spend a little time brushing up on listening skills, communication skills, and learning to respect others opinions without criticizing.