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If you made a new friend and you found out they don't drink and never have and never will, would you try to get them to drink? why? To answer your questions, "Would I try to get them to drink and why?" No, personal choices are just that, PERSONAL... But, IMO, the real question here is not drinking and trying to get others to join you. The real question is when two people form a relationship in which one drinks and one does not, is this aspect of the relationship creating a negative effect on the interaction between them? If the answer is yes, you might need to reconsider the validity of the relationship. If the answer is no, carry on. 
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Question for those who don't drink. If you meet someone you get along well with (friend or more) would you continue to develop that friendship or relationship if you found out they did enjoy drinking? Yes, I don't mind if someone is drinking, I hang out with people who drink. It just when I say I don't want to drink don't offer me anything to drink, I can have fun without it. I can see why it would bother you if they didn't respect that you didn't want to drink. they look at me like I'm not human when I tell them that I don't drink So does that bother you? Yes, they make it seem I have to try it once, I don't have a choice. |
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If you made a new friend and you found out they don't drink and never have and never will, would you try to get them to drink? why? To answer your questions, "Would I try to get them to drink and why?" No, personal choices are just that, PERSONAL... But, IMO, the real question here is not drinking and trying to get others to join you. The real question is when two people form a relationship in which one drinks and one does not, is this aspect of the relationship creating a negative effect on the interaction between them? If the answer is yes, you might need to reconsider the validity of the relationship. If the answer is no, carry on.
My friends drink and I still go out with them, it is the new people I meet that try to get me to drink. |
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If you made a new friend and you found out they don't drink and never have and never will, would you try to get them to drink? why? To answer your questions, "Would I try to get them to drink and why?" No, personal choices are just that, PERSONAL... But, IMO, the real question here is not drinking and trying to get others to join you. The real question is when two people form a relationship in which one drinks and one does not, is this aspect of the relationship creating a negative effect on the interaction between them? If the answer is yes, you might need to reconsider the validity of the relationship. If the answer is no, carry on.
My friends drink and I still go out with them, it is the new people I meet that try to get me to drink. Well, in that case, tell them you that even though you have no interest in drinking you have no problem with their drinking. You should only have to say this one time, if they persist in trying to talk you into doing something you don't want to do they are not your friends... 
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Mon 10/31/11 04:24 PM
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Question for those who don't drink. If you meet someone you get along well with (friend or more) would you continue to develop that friendship or relationship if you found out they did enjoy drinking? Yes, I don't mind if someone is drinking, I hang out with people who drink. It just when I say I don't want to drink don't offer me anything to drink, I can have fun without it. I can see why it would bother you if they didn't respect that you didn't want to drink. they look at me like I'm not human when I tell them that I don't drink So does that bother you? Yes, they make it seem I have to try it once, I don't have a choice. You are your own person. Of course you have a choice. You have to understand that social drinking is "social." If someone buys you a "drink" or offers to, and you refuse it, that is a bit like refusing to be social (its construed as being unfriendly or stuck up) with them. I had the same problem, and I found that they don't like it when you order a coke either. So I order a non-alcoholic beer when I first come in and when they offer to buy me a drink that is what i am drinking. A lot of people don't even notice that your beer is non-alcoholic. I drink it with tomato juice. It tastes just like a real beer. If anyone notices that it is non-alcoholic and "complains" I tell them I am under doctors orders not to drink or that I would love a real beer but I'm taking anibuse. But to just sit there and refuse drinks makes you look like a non-social person who is stuck up. Its not about drinking. Its about a social situation. |
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If a guy asks me why I'm not drinking, I might say "Well if I get lucky tonight, I want to be conscious." Or, "I have a long drive home."
Or: "..because the last time I took a drink I murdered my husband." 
That will scare them. |
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no I don;t tell my friends what to do....or try to
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Question for those who don't drink. If you meet someone you get along well with (friend or more) would you continue to develop that friendship or relationship if you found out they did enjoy drinking? Yes, I don't mind if someone is drinking, I hang out with people who drink. It just when I say I don't want to drink don't offer me anything to drink, I can have fun without it. I can see why it would bother you if they didn't respect that you didn't want to drink. they look at me like I'm not human when I tell them that I don't drink So does that bother you? Yes, they make it seem I have to try it once, I don't have a choice. You are your own person. Of course you have a choice. You have to understand that social drinking is "social." If someone buys you a "drink" or offers to, and you refuse it, that is a bit like refusing to be social (its construed as being unfriendly or stuck up) with them. I had the same problem, and I found that they don't like it when you order a coke either. So I order a non-alcoholic beer when I first come in and when they offer to buy me a drink that is what i am drinking. A lot of people don't even notice that your beer is non-alcoholic. I drink it with tomato juice. It tastes just like a real beer. If anyone notices that it is non-alcoholic and "complains" I tell them I am under doctors orders not to drink or that I would love a real beer but I'm taking anibuse. But to just sit there and refuse drinks makes you look like a non-social person who is stuck up. Its not about drinking. Its about a social situation. Why do it have to be that way? I am very social. |
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Mon 10/31/11 07:42 PM
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Question for those who don't drink. If you meet someone you get along well with (friend or more) would you continue to develop that friendship or relationship if you found out they did enjoy drinking? Yes, I don't mind if someone is drinking, I hang out with people who drink. It just when I say I don't want to drink don't offer me anything to drink, I can have fun without it. I can see why it would bother you if they didn't respect that you didn't want to drink. they look at me like I'm not human when I tell them that I don't drink So does that bother you? Yes, they make it seem I have to try it once, I don't have a choice. You are your own person. Of course you have a choice. You have to understand that social drinking is "social." If someone buys you a "drink" or offers to, and you refuse it, that is a bit like refusing to be social (its construed as being unfriendly or stuck up) with them. I had the same problem, and I found that they don't like it when you order a coke either. So I order a non-alcoholic beer when I first come in and when they offer to buy me a drink that is what i am drinking. A lot of people don't even notice that your beer is non-alcoholic. I drink it with tomato juice. It tastes just like a real beer. If anyone notices that it is non-alcoholic and "complains" I tell them I am under doctors orders not to drink or that I would love a real beer but I'm taking anibuse. But to just sit there and refuse drinks makes you look like a non-social person who is stuck up. Its not about drinking. Its about a social situation. Why do it have to be that way? I am very social. I'm just telling you how it is in this society. I didn't make the rules. If you are social you will find a way to be friendly while at the same time decline the alcohol so people won't feel rejected or offended.
There are ways to do that without feeling put upon or succumbing to peer pressure. |
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Question for those who don't drink. If you meet someone you get along well with (friend or more) would you continue to develop that friendship or relationship if you found out they did enjoy drinking? Yes, I don't mind if someone is drinking, I hang out with people who drink. It just when I say I don't want to drink don't offer me anything to drink, I can have fun without it. I can see why it would bother you if they didn't respect that you didn't want to drink. they look at me like I'm not human when I tell them that I don't drink So does that bother you? Yes, they make it seem I have to try it once, I don't have a choice. You are your own person. Of course you have a choice. You have to understand that social drinking is "social." If someone buys you a "drink" or offers to, and you refuse it, that is a bit like refusing to be social (its construed as being unfriendly or stuck up) with them. I had the same problem, and I found that they don't like it when you order a coke either. So I order a non-alcoholic beer when I first come in and when they offer to buy me a drink that is what i am drinking. A lot of people don't even notice that your beer is non-alcoholic. I drink it with tomato juice. It tastes just like a real beer. If anyone notices that it is non-alcoholic and "complains" I tell them I am under doctors orders not to drink or that I would love a real beer but I'm taking anibuse. But to just sit there and refuse drinks makes you look like a non-social person who is stuck up. Its not about drinking. Its about a social situation. Why do it have to be that way? I am very social. in that situation simply ask for a non alcoholic substitute to whatevr is offerred - most people would be fine with that I wouldn't worry about it that much, really |
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Question for those who don't drink. If you meet someone you get along well with (friend or more) would you continue to develop that friendship or relationship if you found out they did enjoy drinking? Yes, I don't mind if someone is drinking, I hang out with people who drink. It just when I say I don't want to drink don't offer me anything to drink, I can have fun without it. I can see why it would bother you if they didn't respect that you didn't want to drink. they look at me like I'm not human when I tell them that I don't drink So does that bother you? Yes, they make it seem I have to try it once, I don't have a choice. You are your own person. Of course you have a choice. You have to understand that social drinking is "social." If someone buys you a "drink" or offers to, and you refuse it, that is a bit like refusing to be social (its construed as being unfriendly or stuck up) with them. I had the same problem, and I found that they don't like it when you order a coke either. So I order a non-alcoholic beer when I first come in and when they offer to buy me a drink that is what i am drinking. A lot of people don't even notice that your beer is non-alcoholic. I drink it with tomato juice. It tastes just like a real beer. If anyone notices that it is non-alcoholic and "complains" I tell them I am under doctors orders not to drink or that I would love a real beer but I'm taking anibuse. But to just sit there and refuse drinks makes you look like a non-social person who is stuck up. Its not about drinking. Its about a social situation. Why do it have to be that way? I am very social. I'm just telling you how it is in this society. I didn't make the rules. If you are social you will find a way to be friendly while at the same time decline the alcohol so people won't feel rejected or offended.
There are ways to do that without feeling put upon or succumbing to peer pressure. It doesn't have to be like that. He should not have to drink non-alcoholic beer to fit in. Just politely say you don't want a drink, or that you're sticking with soda/water for the evening and it should be fine. |
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Who is in control of your mind?
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If you made a new friend and you found out they don't drink and never have and never will, would you try to get them to drink? why? If I made a new friend; I would respect their right to not drink and would not pressure the person to drink. I accept my friends just as they are. 
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Question for those who don't drink. If you meet someone you get along well with (friend or more) would you continue to develop that friendship or relationship if you found out they did enjoy drinking? Yes, I don't mind if someone is drinking, I hang out with people who drink. It just when I say I don't want to drink don't offer me anything to drink, I can have fun without it. I can see why it would bother you if they didn't respect that you didn't want to drink. they look at me like I'm not human when I tell them that I don't drink So does that bother you? Yes, they make it seem I have to try it once, I don't have a choice. You are your own person. Of course you have a choice. You have to understand that social drinking is "social." If someone buys you a "drink" or offers to, and you refuse it, that is a bit like refusing to be social (its construed as being unfriendly or stuck up) with them. I had the same problem, and I found that they don't like it when you order a coke either. So I order a non-alcoholic beer when I first come in and when they offer to buy me a drink that is what i am drinking. A lot of people don't even notice that your beer is non-alcoholic. I drink it with tomato juice. It tastes just like a real beer. If anyone notices that it is non-alcoholic and "complains" I tell them I am under doctors orders not to drink or that I would love a real beer but I'm taking anibuse. But to just sit there and refuse drinks makes you look like a non-social person who is stuck up. Its not about drinking. Its about a social situation. Why do it have to be that way? I am very social. I'm just telling you how it is in this society. I didn't make the rules. If you are social you will find a way to be friendly while at the same time decline the alcohol so people won't feel rejected or offended.
There are ways to do that without feeling put upon or succumbing to peer pressure. It doesn't have to be like that. He should not have to drink non-alcoholic beer to fit in. Just politely say you don't want a drink, or that you're sticking with soda/water for the evening and it should be fine. It was a suggestion. Nothing "has to be like" anything. Its not that big of a deal. If you have confidence and self esteem, you are not going to be bothered by peer pressure anyway. |
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Hey Will, listen to Navy and Sweet, listen to me, we are telling you straight. When someone offers to buy you a drink just smile, say thanks, and order a coke. Know what I mean? Smooth and easy, it's all about the smile. You have no obligation to explain your choice, you have no reason to feel pressure. Take the ball out of play man, your in control..
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Most people couldn't care less what's in your Glass at a party,as long as you keep it full with your Fave,and not setting it down to be tampered with!
People generally don't worry what you're drinking! If someone pushes a Drink on you which you don't want,there are always Potted Plants around to dispose of it! That is why they are called POTTED PLANTS!
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no i wouldn't if he doesn't want to drink that's his choice, but what i do when i don't feel like drinking is walk around with a cup full of coke and just tell people its rum or something
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Most people couldn't care less what's in your Glass at a party,as long as you keep it full with your Fave,and not setting it down to be tampered with! People generally don't worry what you're drinking! If someone pushes a Drink on you which you don't want,there are always Potted Plants around to dispose of it! That is why they are called POTTED PLANTS!
 
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Most people couldn't care less what's in your Glass at a party,as long as you keep it full with your Fave,and not setting it down to be tampered with! People generally don't worry what you're drinking! If someone pushes a Drink on you which you don't want,there are always Potted Plants around to dispose of it! That is why they are called POTTED PLANTS!
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Lets get waisted cause it makes us think better.
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