Two California Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement just north of the Marine Corps Air Station at Miramar. One of the officers was using a hand held radar device to check speeding vehicles approaching the crest of a hill. The officers were suddenly surprised when the radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour. The officer attempted to reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and then turned off. Just then a deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had in fact locked on to a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low flying exercise near the location.

Back at the CHP Headquarters the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the USMC Base Commander. The reply came back in true USMC style:
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Thank you for your letter. We can now complete the file on this incident.
You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked on to your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it, which is why it shut down.
Furthermore, an Air-to-Ground missile aboard the fully armed aircraft had also automatically locked on to your equipment location.
Fortunately, the Marine Pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to override the automated defense system before the missile was launched to destroy the hostile radar position.
The pilot also suggests you cover your mouths when cussing at them, since the video systems on these jets are very high tech.
Sergeant Johnson, the officer holding the radar gun, should get his dentist to check his left rear molar. It appears the filling is loose. Also, the snap is broken on his holster.
Thank you for your concern.
Semper Fi

This reminds me of my last speeding ticket shortly after I crossed the U.S./Mexican border on my last return trip a few days ago. I crossed at Del Rio, Texas and within 75 miles of that crossing I looked in my rear view mirror and to my surprise I saw flashing red, blue and white lights attached to the top of a Police Pickup Truck. I wasn’t aware of my having broken any law and immediately checked my speedometer. I was traveling 30 km/hr which was 10 km/hr less than the posted limit. I immediately pulled over to the side of the downtown street and they immediately pulled in behind me. As they approached my vehicle, I noticed one of the officers was carrying a “ticket book” like it was the Dead Sea Scroll. He promptly began waving it in front of my face and talking loudly saying “ticket, ticket. You want ticket”? Duh! “Hell yes I want a ticket. It’s been 3 years since I’ve had one and I so miss it I believe I can’t live another minute without one. So get a move on and write the ticket so I can get home. I’m tired.” They scratched their heads, looked at each other for a few seconds and then said “Ticket mucho denarius. $50.00 and no ticket”. Having heard of this bandito act previously I immediately reached in my wallet and pulled out $50.00 pesos. “No, no. U.S. Dollars”. I asked them what the charge is. They said I went across a speed bump too fast. In their words – “bumpty bump mucho km/hr”. I told them I was not aware that there is a maximum speed limit established for crossing the speed bumps. They continued to express that I had broken a law. It was late at night, raining and I was tired from my day’s drive so I simply paid them fifty U.S.Dollars, wished them Buenos Noches and smiled, indicating to them the best I could that even though I was born at night it wasn’t last night and I was on to their escapade. I attempted to remind them that we gringos are an important element of the Mexican economy and that I was going to write about this event at some time later on. I now understand that wasn’t a good idea, but they seemed to not understand anyway so no harm done. I smiled and told them I hoped they have a good time on my money. They too smiled and wished me well plus pleasantly giving me directions to my destination, which I didn’t need. I love to live in Mexico. I think most citizens here are very likeable, polite, respectful, non aggressive and honest. It will take a lot more than that ticket to change my mind. As a matter of fact, I think it’s humorous. END!!