Ok, I would like answers from both sides. If your mate cheats on you and you forgive them, isn't it only right that they make amends? I mean the fact they made such a grevious error shouldn't they want to make amends? for example when the go out call you and let you know who their with and how long they plan to be there and then if it exceeds the expected time to call you and let you know. Just make that extra effort to put your mind at ease and let you know that they care enough about you to want to regain your trust?

99.9% of those who cheat will always cheat again and again. Almost all cheaters will cheat more than once. The odds are stacked against you if you choose to stay with a cheater.

Don't sell yourself short in a relationship, you deserve someone as committed as you are.

GREAT answer.
He's right Been there/ Done that. They never seem to learn, and repeat the same mistakes.

yes, if he really and truhtfully was unfaithful, what u ask of him in your post is a very realistic expectation, and it would be a good idea to make it a condition for continuing the relationship.

If he is sincere about mending his ways, he'd be fine with doing what u ask here. Honestly, he probably should also be taking you along with him when he goes out and seeing less and less of his single friends as you & he are going out with other couples. Unless you have kids & are sharing childcare, he should always take you with him to the clubs - if he doesn't that is a huge red flag honey

this is what is appropriate in a committed relationship

I promise, I won't do it again.

it happened to me about 6 months ago when we were supposebly taking a break.. she wanted to see other people... so i dont know if mine is considered cheating because i was sure faithfull.
however we just broke up for other reasons and part of me is happy.. because i have always wondered if she will do it again. ..
and to be honest... ive read very few that are truely sincere after they cheat....

generally if they are curious once than it will probably happen again. i asked her was i lacking something and she said no it was just a weak moment.. and she was confused..

thats why i hate dating in some ways.. people have these weak confused moments...
i said to myself i have weak moments but i cant imagine hurting you that way...

i also think that when they ask for forgiveness it should be up to them to make every way possible to show you where they are and so forth. generally what happens though is they get annoyed when this happens.

i am happy though that i moved on... i have asked myself will i trust her for marriage ... and to be honest no.... even though we had so much chemistry..

i would encourage you to do the same... really ask yourself if you think you can trust him...

you deserve better than this... and you can get someone better :)

Hire the show cheaters. Let them follow your dude around and see if he really does want to earn your trust back.

If you even have to second guess your relationship with someone it is not worth your time. You should be truly happy. You shouldn't have to wonder where they are and doing something they shouldn't be.

The problem is even if you can forgive you can`t forget.
And the arguments always bring the subject back!
Sad! been there!!

Yes, that would be the considerate thing to do.

If you take them back you are a fool and should have no higher expectation then to be cheated on again. Asking them to check in, is just asking them to be more careful to not get caught the next time.

Trust broken is hard to rebuild. It's going to take give and take on both sides and it takes more than a 50/50 effort...more like 100/100 to have a chance.

if you require that amends be made, then this relationship should just terminate. if someone cheats, the cheated one can either accept it or move on. if you require amends, the cheater will feel like no matter how many times they are CAUGHT they can always make amends. on the times they get away with it, it's no harm no foul. bottom line is any relationship that has to rely on amends is doomed

Yes! AND...how would it be if roles were reversed?

As a former cheater, I'd have to disagree with that. People find God and learn from their mistakes. I went 6 years in my last relationship without cheating, yet was cheated on.

People will do to you what you allow to be done..going back to a person that cheats on you tells them "I do not love nor value myself so you shouldn't either so please keep cheating on me"..NEVER..I repeat..NEVER go back to a cheater!

Once a cheat, always a cheat. Move on to someone who won't hurt you.

YOU wanted to change,so you did..JUST because someone says they wanna change doesn't always mean that they will!

People can and do change all the time. People grow and they evolve. At the same time, past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior. Tough call.