So we were discussing the 'The Last Exorcism'.....comparing to 'The Exorcist' and how the book goes so much deeper into the lives of the characters, external to the problem of Regan being possessed. These people are tortured by their own psychological 'demons', which is the current explanation of what possession truly is. Who is more tortured, and can these characters every be free from their personal demons that haunt them throughout their lives ? Which is scarier...the evil external to ourselves.......or the darkness within ?

For some I'd say the darkness within.. but the external evil can warp the lives of some and even become the darkness within if they let it...

Our personal darkness.......the shadow self......that which we hide from public view....often ourselves too. Must be accepted, come to terms with.

I agree.. I don't hide much from public view i.e. my friends.. But I do have moments that aren't on the positive side that I try to not let anyone see.. For the most part I stay positive but I think we all have our days...

Not 'bad days' kind of thing...deeper.

Example: I went through a series of dysfunctional relationships in my 20's. It seemed I keep finding the same type of woman despite very different externals. Some one suggested that all behavior has some kind of pay-off.....I asked myself what kind of pay-off or reward I was getting from these dysfunctional relationships.

I wanted to be needed....rather than loved.
Why?
We won't discuss that.......but the realization caused me to change....and start dating different women...with better results.

I understand what you're saying.. I've tried to figure out what it was that I kept going for.. I haven't figured it out yet b/c anyone I have dated has been different from the others... I do know what I like, admire and appreciate so I'm holding out for that.. Maybe holding out will help me figure out what I was doing wrong in the past, not sure...

The "shadow self" eventually demands to be known....for all of us, denial is no longer an option. It's then, during the coming to 'terms' that we experience freedom. Once we have embraced ALL aspects of our self....the good, the bad, the ugly, the light and the dark, the only left to do is accept and love who we really are.
And that is true freedom!
In general, our 'shadow self' is not as bad as we first may have thought..

Yet we wrestle with it, deny it, bury it..............
(Smoke-eat-drink-work-sex to extremes)

Does it manifest itself in 'sabotaging' our efforts at success in life?

I think it can... Sometimes it's bigger than what we're able to control inside in the deepest darkest depths of what contributes to the decisions we make...

The darkness within. You can never escape it. I am bipolar and every minute of every day is very difficult. There is no cure and it is progressive. I live this so I believe it is more difficult. But I have never experienced such horror from external sources so I can hardly comment on it.

I truly understand external demons...a child being raped, a wife being beaten to a pulp by her husband, a mother losing her child. I have every bit of respect and compassion for those victims. Their pain and agony is life altering. But so is my personal battle with my affliction. It has been with me all my life and you never get use to it.

But you are aware of it, accept it, deal with it.

What if you just blamed the world or society for your problem....especially if it went untreated?

I have accepted it and I am on medication. The meds don't work too well though and I have tried dozens. The latest meds have been the best but no bed of roses....lol.

I would never blame society for my personal problems. But I do blame a society that has been brainwashed for decades about who and what bipolar people are. The stereotypes out there that are mostly false have been driven by the media and it has very much hurt my chances of meeting someone.

I have my bipolar in my hands and I deal with it myself and never burden anyone with it. But potential dates run away when I tell them about it...I have been rejected on here and another site probably over 100 times.

Noone seems to want to give me a chance and get to know who I am and what kind of person I am. I am a funny, nice, giving and loving person...things women want in a man. I don't have a mean bone in my body and would never hurt a soul. But one of the stereotypes is that bipolars are dangerous...not true.

So I fight the good fight against the outside stereotypes and the fight inside against my personal demons. So far it has gotten me a very lonely life but I keep going....it ain't easy admitting on a public dating forum you are bipolar. But I want people to know we are nice decent people who would be a great spouse. That is why I am on the forums.