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Community > Jokes & Funny Stories

Topic: Don't Mess With Mature Women
uk1971 Joined Tue 04/10/07 Posts: 22015	Tue 05/04/10 03:57 AM
A mature (over 50) lady gets pulled over for speeding... "Is there a problem, Officer?" 'Ma'am, you were speeding.' "Oh, I see." 'Can I see your license please?' "I'd give it to you but I don't have one." 'Don't have one?' "Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving." 'I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please..' "I can't do that." 'Why not?' "I stole this car." 'Stole it?" "Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner." 'You what?' "His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see?" The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. 'Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!' The woman steps out of her vehicle. "Is there a problem sir?" 'One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.' "Murdered the owner?" 'Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please?' The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.. 'Is this your car, ma'am?' "Yes, here are the registration papers." The officer is quite stunned. 'One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.' The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. 'Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner?' "I'll Bet the liar told you I was speeding too?"

skydancingA Joined Mon 11/30/09 Posts: 1605	Tue 05/04/10 06:30 AM
hahahahahahahahaha

nikita5 Joined Tue 03/24/09 Posts: 2410	Tue 05/04/10 07:57 AM


heavenlyboy34 Joined Fri 07/04/08 Posts: 17348	Tue 05/04/10 08:04 AM


ToriK67 Joined Tue 05/04/10 Posts: 8	Tue 05/04/10 03:31 PM


Tessa02 Joined Tue 02/16/10 Posts: 2519	Tue 05/04/10 04:01 PM
Damn, I get stopped so often I'll have to try this one! Maybe I'd better not!!!

StillLooking29 Joined Tue 04/20/10 Posts: 702	Fri 05/07/10 12:37 PM
To bad they record what they/you say now...........lol

2KidsMom Joined Tue 09/30/08 Posts: 58206	Fri 05/07/10 12:50 PM


kissablekiss Joined Mon 03/08/10 Posts: 8528	Fri 05/07/10 01:04 PM
Damn, I get stopped so often I'll have to try this one! Maybe I'd better not!!! Dont try it i tell you lol

realdutchess Joined Fri 05/07/10 Posts: 247	Fri 05/07/10 02:47 PM
i might need to use it one day

worldbound220 Joined Fri 05/07/10 Posts: 46	Sun 05/09/10 01:28 AM
you know, i don't usually lol, like really laugh out loud but this one did it for me. nice one!

Community > Jokes & Funny Stories