Making a baby. This is hilarious!
> >
> > There is not one dirty word in it, and it is funny!--
> >
> > The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a
> > surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was
> > to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, 'Well, I'm off
> > now. The man should be here soon.'
> >
> > Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer
> > happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning,
> > Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'
> >
> > 'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been
> > expecting you.'
> >
> > 'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you
> > know babies are my specialty?'
> >
> > 'Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a
> > seat !.
> >
> > After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'
> >
> > 'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the
> > couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed.. And sometimes the living room
> > floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'
> >
> > 'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and
> > me!'
> >
> > 'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we
> > try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles,
> > I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'
> >
> > 'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs. Smith..
> >
> > 'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be In
> > and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'
> >
> >
> > 'Don't I know it,' said Mrs. Smith quietly.
> >
> > The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his
> > baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.
> >
> > 'Oh, my God!' Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.
> >
> > 'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their
> > mother was so difficult to work with.'
> >
> > 'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Smith.
> >
> > 'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the
> > job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a
> > good look'
> >
> > 'Four and five deep?' said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.
> >
> > 'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too.
> > The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly
> > concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.
> > Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had
> > to pack it all in.'
> >
> > Mrs. Smith leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your,
> > uh...equipment?'
> >
> > 'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod
> > and we can get to work right away.'
> >
> > 'Tripod?'
> >
> > 'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much
> > too big to be held in the hand very long.'
> > Mrs. Smith fainted

Wow, that was really funny.