ok i have been apart from my ex my childs father for almost 2years now
and our daughter is almost 2 years old so heres my question her father
has a girlfriend but he never comes to see her so she does not know who
he or she is... she is with me all the time and i feel really bad if i
want to go out with my friends or even a date. i know she is young and
might not understand whats going on but how do i go about feeling ok
inside with leaving her at my moms house for me to go out with friends
or on dates... i am only 22 come july 23 so i am young but what stops me
is that i am a mom first... am i being a bad mom and just need to let
this go and just raise my daughter or should i remember that i am young
too and its ok to date when you have a baby?????????? please help im
losing my mind

i felt the same way at first hun. and yes, ur a mom first, but u
deserve to have someone special in your life. do something for
yourself, because the rest is all for ur little girl.

If you are leaving her with family I don't see where the problem is..she
knows them and will always know you..leaving her for a few hours
shouldnt hurt.

TRUE WORDS SWEETIEPIE , COFFEE

coffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, yay, ty

I think that it's probably safe for you to go out! I think that you are
entitled especially since your ex has moved on. Moms can date too. Just
do it resposibly.

i know but when i go out just to the store she comes up to me and says
mommy come back mommy no leave and i feel that she might think im not
coming home if she see me go out to have fun for the night how do i
break this

take her with you...it's worth it.

hey

all i can say is enjoy and till you find the guy you think you want as a
regular guy

i would suggest not parading the contestants in front of yer child

but be sure you are over your x bf

i know of (first hand) someone getting married for a few years
and the guy tryed to addopt the child

the bio donor never spent anytime w/child and mother bad mouthed him all
the time

the woman divorced the man that raised her child for 8-9
years and married the bio donor

the child turned into an alcoholic and nearly died from loss of liver
function

I felt the same way and someone close to me told me that i needed to set
aside a day just for me to have fun. So i set aside that day a i felt
guitly trust me but i did and my friend took my son and i had fun. What
im saying is that you need to have fun and relax and meet really nice
guys.

I felt the same way and someone close to me told me that i needed to set
aside a day just for me to have fun. So i set aside that day a i felt
guitly trust me but i did and my friend took my son and i had fun. What
im saying is that you need to have fun and relax and meet really nice
guys.

My advise is anytime is good time to start a fresh new beguning... only
thing u need to b careful is not to do the same mistake in selecting the
wrong guy and if not sure abt who is right for you then its better to
check it out.. explore its your life its ur time... go for it...
goodluck

i personally feel that you shouldn't date if she's not ready. she
deserves you full-time if that's what she needs.

the cool thing about a child THAT young, however...they go to sleep
fairly early. if i were wanting to go out, i'd get her tucked in to
bed, get her to sleep, and have a family member stay over while you go
take in a movie.

i agree that you should never bring a man around your daughter until
you've been involved with him for some time. with me, that's six
months.

thank you all for your advice i take it all in but i think i know only
when its right to date and i guess for the moment of time i will just
have fun with my life and my daughter and mr right and forever will come
when i am not looking for him lolz

good thought Italian girl... go for it ... its time for fun
our moral support is alway there for U.

JSH

Go with your heart. I understand exactly how you feel. I raised my 2
oldest boys from day one.I was with their sperm donor until I was 5
months pregnant with my middle son. He ended up hitting me and I left.
My kids don't know their bio dad. My youngest does but that's a
different story. Don't feel bad if you want to go out one night. You
daughter will understand once she gets older. It will be difficutlt to
leave her for a few hours but enjoy yourself.

Well if you dont feel comfortable dating or going out then I would
suggest going to a movie or maybe some shopping.I felt guilty because my
daughter lived with her Dad and then I felt guilty because I left my son
in daycare because I had to work.Enough with the guilt.Your leaving her
with your Mom.she may cry a bit but she'll be fine.don't feel guilty and
don't let others make you feel that way.Why custodial parents have to
feel guilty about wanting a break every now and then is beyond me.Good
Luck to you .

let me ask you some questios first italion hun....


1. Is the person you are thinking of going out with mature and
respectful?

2. Can you trust your life with the person you would leave your child
with (cause you are trusting hers)?

3. Are you ready to be in a relationship where you might have to make
compromises soemtimes (for in a real relationship you will have to
compromise a little bit)?

4. Is there any medical reason why you should not leave your child with
someone else for a couple hours?

5. Is there any logical reason or law stating that you are not entitled
to having fun away from your child sometimes?


You can see where these questions lead, and how you should answer them I
am sure. I hope this helps.

And on a side note, to rebuttal a couple people, no your child does not
need you around 24/7. In fact that can be a very unhealthy thing for
them as well as for you. They WILL grow dependant on you being around
and I garuntee you it will be very hard and traumatic for them to learn
independance this way. And when they finally do leave the nest it will
be that much more traumatic for you as well, so go out and have some fun
once in a while. Meet new people, and find that special someone to help
you raise your child(ren) whop will care for you and treat you with the
love dignity and respect that you deserve.