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| Topic: What r u thinking about right now?? - part 5 | |
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Expectations are a whore to the most selfish emotions one possesses.
Without expectations, we are free. |
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 I hope you have a good time, and he's not really a scammer.
thanks totes
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That makes sense.
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The only possible destination is now.
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Well, it's a negative thought, but with a positive outcome. You have to let go when you know it's a waste of time, right? Funny thing about me is that's the hardest time for me to let go. I'm not sure if it's just because of how disappointed I get, how stuborn I can be, or just that I'm insane. Could be a bit of everything, who knows. I think I'm just so used to everything being a struggle and a pain the ***. It's like if it's good, I have to destroy it or at least make it difficult so I know how to deal. It's sick and twisted, but that's pretty much what I've come up with. |
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You're right, Colin. I'm going to try to live in now. **** the past. Thanks, you made me feel better. As usual.
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Well, it's a negative thought, but with a positive outcome. You have to let go when you know it's a waste of time, right? Funny thing about me is that's the hardest time for me to let go. I'm not sure if it's just because of how disappointed I get, how stuborn I can be, or just that I'm insane. Could be a bit of everything, who knows. I think I'm just so used to everything being a struggle and a pain the ***. It's like if it's good, I have to destroy it or at least make it difficult so I know how to deal. It's sick and twisted, but that's pretty much what I've come up with. I'm the same way. |
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I hope you have a good time, and he's not really a scammer.
thanks totes
You're welcome. 
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Sweet.
Lately when I really feel ****ed beyond belief in the head I listen to jazz. I've really been getting into it. Especially Monk, that guy I showed you. It's so discordant... but it's musically correct. It takes the edge off. |
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Maybe I'll start listening to it, too. I need to do something besides torturing myself over stupid **** I have no control over.
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It can be anything.
Jazz has kinda become my thing lately. I feel a connection to these guys... So much ****ed up pain, and yet they help me shed mine through these recordings. Like Charlie Parker... man, he'll take you right out of your element, whatever it may be. |
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Yeah, I love escaping through music. It really does help. Nice to know I'm not the only ****ed up soul in the world...I can't wait to be really, really old, so all this crap will be over. I'll be the crazy cat lady I told you about.
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Ever try juggling?
It's weird. Small tasks are just like meditation in a way. They change brain waves... and can help restructure a fractured thought process. |
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No, but I used to have a friend whose bf is a juggler. She met him on a dating site and he used a pic of himself juggling and that's what attracted her to him....
I agree, painting and making stuff is like that for me, well, it used to be like that for me. However, I don't do it anymore. It used to make me happy, but I stopped. Traded one addiction for another, but it's time to trade again. |
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I'm going to sleep.
Wish me luck in my dreams. Lately I've been building slides in them. Don't know why. Last night the slide led into a broken up ice pond. Not practical at all. Have a good night everybody! |
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Sounds intriguing, I'm always late for class in mine, or looking for something, or just being freaked out.
Hope you have peaceful dreams. Goodnight.
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I'm thinking it's almost late
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im thinking i just won beer pong and loving it too bad i didnt play on a night for money
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 Just wakin` up, sippin` some coffee and wondering, where am I? 
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I'm thinking Breakfast!
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