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| Topic: baby mama drama | |
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Yeah, I thought my daughter was coming over for the wk-end, the Ex left for the wk-end and my daughter had to stay home to look after the pets. 2 dogs and 3 cats. My daughter will be 17 in May. Last minute change of plans, not typical but not unheard of, not a big deal, We went out for dinner, listened to some live music. Now she is coming over this wk-end instead.
Right now its not a big deal. But sometimes I have made other plans with my girlfriend and its an inconvenince. My girlfriend has kids too, and she is very understanding of the needs of my children to spend time with me. |
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She asked why..."with an attitude"...and i explained. I think you're forgetting that she was probably just as excited about getting together as you were. When you suddenly told her that you couldn't see her it must have been very disappointing for her, which explains her reaction (what you call a 'attitude'). I don't think it was the cancellation that was an issue as much as your ex being involved. A relationship is supposed to be between two people, not three, so I see her point here. Yes you have an ex and it will be part of your next relationship, but that is YOUR issue and shouldn't be your next partners. It's simply a matter of how you handle integrating your ex into your next relationship. Who the hell in this world is without some form of baggage at 41?
Actually quite a lot of people, but it's not the baggage that's the issue, it's how it's handled. When you first started dating in your teens or 20's, would you have wanted your girlfriend to keep pushing her last boyfriend into your relationship? Probably not. There's no difference here. No one wants to play third fiddle. look i think your missing the point here. she had every right to be disappointed! I couldn't leave bottom line my daughter needed me. so how do i break the news knowing she was gonna be disappointed? she asked...y not get babysitter? ur older daughter is there isn't she? you see i had to explain the details or lie... She knew about my phsycho ex....been down that road before so i'm upfront about it! once i said the deatails she got really pissed and started talking smack and saying i'm not putting up with this crap and said later "click"..... So the question was this! Is it wrong for me to expect her to support me? I mean she knew about ex "warned her"! I don't know i'm in the opinion of if you like someone you have expectaions based on things they can control things thay can not that go wrong you stand behind them and support them...thats how i see it anyways.....but i see some are in the opinion to the contrary! now if she had no prior knowledge i would of been much more apoligetic....but we where talking daily for two weeks! |
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you see i had to explain the details or lie...
if someone cancelled plans with me at the last minute, the very least i would expect would be an explanation of the details. why does that seem to be such a difficult thing to do? |
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you see i had to explain the details or lie...
if someone cancelled plans with me at the last minute, the very least i would expect would be an explanation of the details. why does that seem to be such a difficult thing to do? well thats when I needed to mention my ex....thats when it got ugly. so ealier people critisized why mention the ex? You see my point? Not that I wanted to mention my ex but due to needing a logocal explanation i had to mention her. |
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Yeah, I thought my daughter was coming over for the wk-end, the Ex left for the wk-end and my daughter had to stay home to look after the pets. 2 dogs and 3 cats. My daughter will be 17 in May. Last minute change of plans, not typical but not unheard of, not a big deal, We went out for dinner, listened to some live music. Now she is coming over this wk-end instead. Right now its not a big deal. But sometimes I have made other plans with my girlfriend and its an inconvenince. My girlfriend has kids too, and she is very understanding of the needs of my children to spend time with me. Exactly. It's wonderful when the grown up can act like grown ups. |
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you see i had to explain the details or lie...
if someone cancelled plans with me at the last minute, the very least i would expect would be an explanation of the details. why does that seem to be such a difficult thing to do? well thats when I needed to mention my ex....thats when it got ugly. so ealier people critisized why mention the ex? You see my point? Not that I wanted to mention my ex but due to needing a logocal explanation i had to mention her. You did the right thing. Don't stress about it. If this woman can't handle the disappointment of a canceled date without throwing a hissy fit then you can imagine what she'll be like when she doesn't get her way in other things. Be glad you found out what she was like now. |
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you see i had to explain the details or lie...
if someone cancelled plans with me at the last minute, the very least i would expect would be an explanation of the details. why does that seem to be such a difficult thing to do? well thats when I needed to mention my ex....thats when it got ugly. so ealier people critisized why mention the ex? You see my point? Not that I wanted to mention my ex but due to needing a logocal explanation i had to mention her. You did the right thing. Don't stress about it. If this woman can't handle the disappointment of a canceled date without throwing a hissy fit then you can imagine what she'll be like when she doesn't get her way in other things. Be glad you found out what she was like now. You're right, Ruth. 
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