Woke up to a phone call from the Principal of the online Home School that my children are currently enrolled in. My oldest just got off grounding. She had done a series of events that was selfish, thoughtless and dangerous, like letting her sister take the blame for herself, and giving away passwords attached to paid accounts. Endangering her little sister by dragging her through a creek bed from the park. She wasn't raised like this... what is going on? That was last punishment. This round, she went through Halloween, caught up with some of her neighborhood friends, was allowed to web mail her friends from school and then got caught lying to her friends claiming she was EMO, OMG.. she is lying threw her teeth. Where is she getting this stuff. I monitor what she watches and what she listens to, is it her neighborhood friends maybe?, A few days off grounding and a parent is so afraid of her contacting her kid that she threatened harassment charges. *** Pulls hair out and going gray.

How old is your daughter?

She is only 11 years old, turn 12 in February.

She is only 11 and your seeing this sort of behavior?

So sorry..

Has her behavior changed as of late? Is there is possibly that she is using drugs? Or is she on any medication, if so it may be causing brain chemical changes...she may not be acting out intentionally.

Her only social activity is Church, as of a few days ago she wasnt allowed to be with any of her friends due to being grounded. She is home schooled so I wouldnt know where she is getting the drugs if that is it. So I dont think its that. But she is going through puberty.

I understand..my boys are pretty close to home also.
she is not on any prescriptions?

I have an 11 year old son.


God bless you. ha ha just... God Bless.

No prescription drugs... NONE... I don't get it, I am not the over protective mom, or the zealot Christian. Maybe its just puberty and insecurity. I don't know but this is round two with her. She has no idea what Emo and Goth is all about. I think I should actually give her a reality check and just be honest and show her what its all about. Google it for her, show her the difference. Not sure about that though... just a thought.

For the most part it sounds like what my kid went thru. She was lyin about these parties that did not exist,tellin avaryone she had a BF,spray paint taggin, makin up stories about things she never did, even went thru the Emo stage. All befor she turned 15..so I get it. I belive it is a way for her to "fit in" w/ others. She is "showing off" by draggin her sis around, Make a hands off rule[w/severe concequences] an tell her that silly actions like pullin her thru the creek could really hurt or kill one or both of them[explain in bloody detail]. As a girl..she is asserting her social standing w/ her friends. We all know girls are the worst, meanest things in school. Dont treat her w/ kid gloves or she will think your soft...show her youtube news clips of what happens to those that run amuck. They can be a real eye opener. Remember to take 5 min to look em in the eye an ask...whats up babe..how was yer day, and exchange a lil contact. Mine grew up and now tells me everything and is not afraid to ask me anything. Some things I just dont wanna know... Its rough..but it is a phase...but keep a wary eye...good luck.

I'm sure there is some puberty and insecurity..of course. That doesn't really explain the sort of behavior your talking about.
My kids never did the goth or emo thing when they were young, so i don't really get it, just what they tell me. Maybe not a bad idea to google a few things and show her, seems she doesn't really understand it either.
Maybe take her in for a physical, get a check up. She may be getting ready to start her periods (i hear they can that young) and maybe something physical she doesn't understand.

I raised 3 boys alone and we had some tough years..they are grown up now and doing well, hang in there.

Good Luck

Have you contacted any of the parents of the neighborhood kids- her friends to see if they are having any simialr problems?
Maybe the girls made a pact to see who could do the worst stuff?
I would have her checked by her md- sometimes behavior changes that drastic may have a physical component, has she started her menses yet? Rule out physical/ then if not that- study up on behavior modification, rational emotive behavior.
Maybe she is acting out due to wanting to be 'normal' and go to public school, children get angry...don't know how to express it so act out. Make sure you tell her that you love her through it all, that helps alot with healing.
You have to get going tho...if it's like this now...Best of luck.

I took my son to a Shaman, energy healer through some difficult times...it made an HUGE difference. As a christian, that sort of thing my go against your beliefs...
it forever changed him for the better, and he is 26 now. Just a thought.

Thank you, it is a thought... I will get her checked out, and yes she has started her mense this year. I am looking into some free counseling at the moment too. To see if there is anything that I can do to help her through this stage as well.

I am christian but I am open... all things are through God and if you believe then healing can occur. So Shaman works for some and not others. I am glad it made a difference, i will keep it in mind if all else fails for sure.