i wanted to thank everyone for your responses. my aunt showed up tonight and we had a long talk. she told me to start combing the country for jobs in a specific field and a few other things that are going to help.. i hope.

anyway i think i had a lil bit of hysterics tonight which makes me feel silly but its gotten to the point where i'm wanting to scream at nothing.

we came to an empass tonight and for now that will hold us. I'm hoping and praying for patience but most of all searching for a damned job.

seriously.. i hate not working.