everywhere i go when i try to fit in with other people, i'm always their punching bag. for example, i'm always been made fun of and disrespected. ilive alone and my family dont really communicate with me anymore even though i call numerous times and they dont answer. yes, i work and i go to college. i tried not to be negitive about it all time but its killin me. what better i can do to overcome this?

Maybe you are hanging out with the wrong people...I have noticed that if I hang out with negative people I will become negative too...You really can't be accountable for your family's actions

true, but hard for me to accept this change, i mean its not like before when my sisters and my brother and i often communicated. today i feel like i'm alone not hearing from any of my family anymore.

Absolutely true...negativity tends to breed negativity. Find people that you go to school or work with that you get along with, have things in common with, and hang out/do things with them. Maybe get involved in area groups that interest you. Also, it's hard for a lot of people to be so direct, but maybe sit down with your family and ask them why they seem to be distant lately, tell them it bothers you, you miss the connection and would like to be close again, see what can be done to work things out.

Going to a technical college away from home, inanother region of the country, maybe even another culture, as and older student can really make you feel like a fish out of water.

You have to have on campus counselors that can help you with the adjustment and I would recommend you talk to them. Even technical schools have on campus activities and this is a good way to make friends with students and staff alike.

Where you are at have some phenominal churches that I would make a regular effort to participate in. It is a great way to make a wide range of friends and can be a great help in getting through the lonelyness that all students feel in a temporary community.

Last but not least I would look for something that makes you better at social skills. If you consistently feel like someone's "punching bag" then you need to learn to set boundries and communicate. Generally speaking being in groups that have a less macho way of bonding is a good start but that doesn't mean hanging out with a bunch of sissies. I would suggest Habitat for Humanity. If you volunteer there you will have team leaders that will help you learn skills and work as a team doing something fun.

I don't know where you are in relation to your siblings but if you are not bumping shoulders in Mom's kitchen it is just a lot to try to keep up on the day to day. They probably miss you as much as you miss them but don't know how to express it. There may be some jealousy that you are in school, living on your own, or frustration that you are far away and it costs money to call. The family may miss your contribution. College always sounds like more fun than it is. But from your comments about social skills you may have been the family scapegoat and now that you are not around to pick on I am sure they have found a new victim(s).

I can only tell you that this streach that you are making to better your life is not easy for anyone but the rewards are so worth it I hope you stick with it.

You will find you have a good support network if you make and effort to make friends of both sexes and a variety of ages here on Mingle. You don't always have to be up but share some of the good things along with concerns and you will have a circle of friends fast. I am usually a night owl if you need a "Grandma" to cheer you on.

Being on your own is a big change in your life. It isn't easy to fit in anywhere you go. You are young and maybe you are still finding out what you want to be when you grow up. Thing is until you find who you are you will never quite fit in anywhere. Find something you are interested in and do your homework. If you like kite flying, don't hang out with people who skateboard. Look around for the group of people that like what you like, you should fit in quite nicely. Young people diss on each other hard core, so don't take it personally. Maybe if you wrote to your siblings individually one of them will respond. If they are younger than you then they could be looking to you to set the example. I grew up without any brothers so I had to find my own. Do you have a father you could relate to? If not you may find it helpful to find an older gentleman to hang with. I used to talk to this old cat, and he would come up with some cool stuff. He was complaining one time about not having enough teeth to chew food. He said, " at my age I can still make a baby, but I can't eat a damn apple. As a man gets old he should lose his balls and keep his teeth." Funny guy. Best of luck to you son, Bulldog.

Dont sweat this... Dude, look where you ARE- Connectict!!


A MexiCAN (Danny Trejo quote) in Conn? LMAO- no wonder.


I got the same thing here- I come back to my Tiny REDNECK town to settle in, and I got nothing much in common with the peeps here-
In Los Angeles, I had tons of freinds.

All you need is one decent friend, that says- your ok, you can hang out with me!

It used to be- good people were everywhere, but nowadays- you have to go through about 1000 to find one decent friend- I mean a REAL stnbd up Friend- not a -
Oh Im callin' cause I need your help Friend. A friend that has your back, no matter what.

Be patient, life is VERY VERY long. If you die with 5 REAL freinds in life, you have done VERY well. For reals.