Topic: why do we,,,,,? | |
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search for relationships instead of friendships. There are soo many dating sights out here and the divorce rate is so high. Why dont we focus more on meeting people who make great friends? Wouldnt that give us a better pool of perspective partners? One huge difference I found, now that I am older, is a rush to find 'the one.' I think in that rush we intentionally overlook alot of things that we may not if we took our time and enjoyed loving ourselves. My childhood love and I started out as great friends before we ever became involved. We had no pressure or rush to be in a relationship because our lives were already happy. We ended up married and although, years later, it ended, I have more good memories with that one person then with any and all 'relationships' since. We are also still good friends, which is invaluable to me. Just would be cool to get back to finding friends and THEN lovers. Where are all the 'hanging out' sites as opposed to 'dating'...lol ,,Im enjoying the friends I am making here, thanx for reading,, I have read so many profiles of women who are looking for Mr. Right or "the one". These women also want Mr Right to be with them for the rest of their life. Well depending on the age of that woman, that could be a very long time. Now in reality, how often does that happen. Not very often. Need proof. How many of you that are members of this site have been in a previous relationship or relationships? I am sure it is the majority. For whatever reason, your first relationship did not end up being your life partner. So what is my point? You do not necessarily have to find Mr Right(or Mrs Right) in order for you to get involved in a serious relationship and be happy. Maybe your definition of Mr/Mrs Right should be amended to: I found a Lover that is my best friend right now, I will worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. So what if you end up in a relationship that lasts only five years, or ten years or fifteen years. If your time during that relationship for the most part of it is a happy time, then it was worth it. I have done that twice with no regrets. Face it people, individuals change as they mature. That can cause two people to drift apart. Nothing really wrong with that, it is just time for the two of you to go ahead and move on. So why am I posting this on this thread? Because regardless of how long any relationship lasts, during that time you and your partner need to be best of friends. If the friendship breaks down then more than likely the relationship will break down. Do not get me wrong, because I do know that there are couples that are out there that are celebrating their 25th to 50th wedding anniversaries. I congratulate them and respect them for doing that. How much do you want to bet that these couples are best of friends. Yes there are couples that do find a way to remain in a permanent relationship, but in reality that seldom happens to the majority of us, myself included. Your lover that could never be your best friend is a booty call. Your best friend that is not your lover is your interim best friend. Your Lover that is your best friend replaces your interim best friend and is probably Mr Right or Mrs Right, regardless for how long that relationship lasts. Keep in mind that Mr/Mrs Right today could be Mr/Mrs Wrong tomorrow. Enjoy to the fullest what you have when you have it. Just thought I would share how I see things when it comes to relationships and friendship. |
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Way to go J!!
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Thanks Lil
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I am ONLY looking for friendships! me tooooooooo!!!!! Me threeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! Me fooooouuuuuur! |
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search for relationships instead of friendships. There are soo many dating sights out here and the divorce rate is so high. Why dont we focus more on meeting people who make great friends? Wouldnt that give us a better pool of perspective partners? One huge difference I found, now that I am older, is a rush to find 'the one.' I think in that rush we intentionally overlook alot of things that we may not if we took our time and enjoyed loving ourselves. My childhood love and I started out as great friends before we ever became involved. We had no pressure or rush to be in a relationship because our lives were already happy. We ended up married and although, years later, it ended, I have more good memories with that one person then with any and all 'relationships' since. We are also still good friends, which is invaluable to me. Just would be cool to get back to finding friends and THEN lovers. Where are all the 'hanging out' sites as opposed to 'dating'...lol ,,Im enjoying the friends I am making here, thanx for reading,, I have read so many profiles of women who are looking for Mr. Right or "the one". These women also want Mr Right to be with them for the rest of their life. Well depending on the age of that woman, that could be a very long time. Now in reality, how often does that happen. Not very often. Need proof. How many of you that are members of this site have been in a previous relationship or relationships? I am sure it is the majority. For whatever reason, your first relationship did not end up being your life partner. So what is my point? You do not necessarily have to find Mr Right(or Mrs Right) in order for you to get involved in a serious relationship and be happy. Maybe your definition of Mr/Mrs Right should be amended to: I found a Lover that is my best friend right now, I will worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. So what if you end up in a relationship that lasts only five years, or ten years or fifteen years. If your time during that relationship for the most part of it is a happy time, then it was worth it. I have done that twice with no regrets. Face it people, individuals change as they mature. That can cause two people to drift apart. Nothing really wrong with that, it is just time for the two of you to go ahead and move on. So why am I posting this on this thread? Because regardless of how long any relationship lasts, during that time you and your partner need to be best of friends. If the friendship breaks down then more than likely the relationship will break down. Do not get me wrong, because I do know that there are couples that are out there that are celebrating their 25th to 50th wedding anniversaries. I congratulate them and respect them for doing that. How much do you want to bet that these couples are best of friends. Yes there are couples that do find a way to remain in a permanent relationship, but in reality that seldom happens to the majority of us, myself included. Your lover that could never be your best friend is a booty call. Your best friend that is not your lover is your interim best friend. Your Lover that is your best friend replaces your interim best friend and is probably Mr Right or Mrs Right, regardless for how long that relationship lasts. Keep in mind that Mr/Mrs Right today could be Mr/Mrs Wrong tomorrow. Enjoy to the fullest what you have when you have it. Just thought I would share how I see things when it comes to relationships and friendship. great read tx for that,. |
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