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| Topic: Dear Diary...........OMG another Diary Part 120 + - part 55 | |
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lol, i will throw the dog's ball...
and the cat brings it back to me ...... the dog set's there ,looking at me like you want to go get that dont ya ! 
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good kitty !! silly doggy !
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DOGS Diary 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing! 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! CATS Diary Day 983 of My Captivity My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ... Holy crap that is hilarious |
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I love that one I can almost hear the cats sinister voice narrating it
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Edited by
chevylover1965
on
Tue 09/01/09 11:27 PM
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ya, the voice of the brain ! off of pinky and the brain......lmao
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I love that one I can almost hear the cats sinister voice narrating it With reading glasses on - thats how I pictured it. A cat with a methodical, sinister voice with reading glasses on, holding the paper. Bastards!
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good night folk's.......
 
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G'night Chevy 
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Cwazy!
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zip zip zoom
puter IS faster 
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Dear Diary;
There is a cat hanging out in the drive way! I went to pet him/her and its so damn cute. But of course since my roomate/uncle has a dog there is no way I could keep it. I think its an outdoor cat because it has a flea collar and does not seem starved at all. Oh and the dog keeps barking really loud if I go out to pet it. And since its 3am, I try to keep the noise level to none. BUT ITS A KITTY! 
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awww pretty kitty puddy tat
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Dear d, one of my rockstar freinds has the coolest cat. A female calico named snickers. Because it looks like a smashed open snickers candy bar exactly for colors. Caramel, nougat, peanut tan, and black chocolate. Well the rockstars kid just had to have a dog and brought home a yapping idiot mini doberman named rex. The minute the dog came in the home snickers the cat shredded the dog, the owner, the owners kid, and 2 of the owners kids freinds. As ted nugent would say- "Piss, vinegar, claws, teeth, and hair". So the cat became an outdoor cat- not by choice. Yup. She's gonna have her 2nd litter of kittens. There was a calico in the first bunch. Most likely be one in this bunch. Snickers likes me. She will let me pet her. She gives me love nibbles, but never crazy or scary violent like she is to everyone else. I hope they find a home for snickers and its kittens before winter. My personal decision would have been to keep the attack cat and never brought retardo dog home. He's one of those dogs. Barks at people. Barks at birds. Barks at his own dogcrap. We were laughing sunday. He was barking at cars. One bark per car as they drove by. Vroom. Bark! A minute later- vroom. Bark! Another minute later- vroom. Bark! This went on for 10 minutes. Finally a car drove by and rex didn't bark. I looked at him and said "Hey dumbass you missed one"! He looked around at everyone and again- Bark! Retardodog.
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And that indoor cat being forced to be an outside cat because of retardodog? If that cat gets a 2nd chance at that dog it would kill it in 10 seconds.
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The sound of a 24/7 barking mini dobie is like fingernails on a chalkboard. I'd kill it at 2 am.
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 Good Morning
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Helllllllllllllllllllloooo Baby!!!!
 ya this is the big bopper speaking  hahaha oh youuuuuuuuuuuu sweet thang  Do I what?  Will I what????  Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh baby you know what I like!!!  
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Dear diary.....last night I went to dinner and had Steak Oscar with bernaise sauce, crab and shrimp, baked stuffed potato with cream cheese, bacon and chives and garlic carrots. With a lovely australian shiraz........mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!
 I then decided to have a trio of desserts......a white chocolate brownie with whipped cream, chocolate mousse with chocolate sauce with chocolate biscotti and an english toffee sticky pudding with vanilla bean icecream!! |
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was it a date?
is it your birthday? Were you thinking of me? Dear diary.....last night I went to dinner and had Steak Oscar with bernaise sauce, crab and shrimp, baked stuffed potato with cream cheese, bacon and chives and garlic carrots. With a lovely australian shiraz........mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!! I then decided to have a trio of desserts......a white chocolate brownie with whipped cream, chocolate mousse with chocolate sauce with chocolate biscotti and an english toffee sticky pudding with vanilla bean icecream!! |
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was it a date? is it your birthday? Were you thinking of me? Dear diary.....last night I went to dinner and had Steak Oscar with bernaise sauce, crab and shrimp, baked stuffed potato with cream cheese, bacon and chives and garlic carrots. With a lovely australian shiraz........mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!! I then decided to have a trio of desserts......a white chocolate brownie with whipped cream, chocolate mousse with chocolate sauce with chocolate biscotti and an english toffee sticky pudding with vanilla bean icecream!!
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