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| Topic: A Texas Joke | |
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During World War II a shot up bomber was trying to make it back across the Mediterranean Sea from a mission with four crew members in the back; a Brit, a Frenchman, a Texan, and a Mexican.
The pilot calls back to the crew, "I sorry guys but we are losing fuel. If we don't shed some weight fast we all are going to die!" The Frenchman jumps up and runs to the bomb bay opening and yells, "Viva la France", and jumps to his death. The other crew members say, "What a brave man." Some time goes by and the pilot yells back, "Sorry guys but we still aren't going to make it. We need to shed more weight." Without a word, the Brit runs over and jumps to his death. The rest of the crew nods knowingly. The pilot can see land approaching but yells back, "We are almost there but we still need to shed weight or we won't make it." The Texan stands up. He looks around with determination in his eyes, and yells, "Remember the Alamo" then throws the Mexican out of the plane. |
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rememeber the what??? the almond???? i forget
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There is a reason this joke is posted here in the 'Texas' topics as opposed to the joke area. Mr. Robertson was a lawyer who used to office down the hall from me. He was a true gentleman in every way. He was also a navigator on B17 bombers during World War II and he said this joke came from that era. I guess his memory was getting a little rusty because he told the joke over and over (every week or so) and we always laughed.
I told him one day, "Mr. Robertson, someday you are going to be gone and I'm going to tell that joke in your memory." He passed recently, so I thought this would be a good way to fulfill my promise and share the story with my friends. |
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ahhhh I'm sorry for your loss hon
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You know you are in Texas when...
The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground. The trees are whistling for the dogs. The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance. Hot water now comes out of both taps. You can make sun tea instantly. You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron. The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly. You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car. You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window. You actually burn your hand opening the car door. You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" You realize that asphalt has a liquid state. The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper. Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs. The cows are giving evaporated milk. |
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ahhhh I'm sorry for your loss hon Thanks, You're a Peach. |
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nah...I'm more of a nana
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During World War II a shot up bomber was trying to make it back across the Mediterranean Sea from a mission with four crew members in the back; a Brit, a Frenchman, a Texan, and a Mexican. The pilot calls back to the crew, "I sorry guys but we are losing fuel. If we don't shed some weight fast we all are going to die!" The Frenchman jumps up and runs to the bomb bay opening and yells, "Viva la France", and jumps to his death. The other crew members say, "What a brave man." Some time goes by and the pilot yells back, "Sorry guys but we still aren't going to make it. We need to shed more weight." Without a word, the Brit runs over and jumps to his death. The rest of the crew nods knowingly. The pilot can see land approaching but yells back, "We are almost there but we still need to shed weight or we won't make it." The Texan stands up. He looks around with determination in his eyes, and yells, "Remember the Alamo" then throws the Mexican out of the plane. 
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You know you are in Texas when... The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground. The trees are whistling for the dogs. The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance. Hot water now comes out of both taps. You can make sun tea instantly. You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron. The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly. You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car. You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window. You actually burn your hand opening the car door. You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" You realize that asphalt has a liquid state. The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper. Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs. The cows are giving evaporated milk.
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