im having a crazy time with all kinds of weird feelings we were together 7 years and have 2 kids together... shes seeing another guy and already introducing my kids to him and his family i feel its wrong what do you think?

How long have you been split up? It seems that she has moved on but you are stuck- are you having a hard time letting go?

mo not at all we broke up 4 months ago but really stopped everything hugging kissin sex dinners and all just about 3 weeks ago... she pops up at my house all the time to just be there its weird and im over it i just dont know how to take the steps to permanecy

i feel your pain bro...........

That can definately be tough. Depending on your family court laws in your state, you may be able to request that he not stay over night and stuff like that if they are not currently living together.

Hmmmmm she just pops up just to be there? but she is seeing someone else? interesting.

You need to tell her that it is all over- there is no chance of going back- you will help with the kids but the spontaneous visits have to stop if you are both going to be able to move on.

Its time to get out there and start to date- start by being old school- go out with a bunch of friends- get your feet wet so to speak- ok i know i sound like an old lady but take your time and all good things will happen for you

yeah and its not like im not out with other women .. i dont sit in my room crying its just like head games and crap... its been long enough im over it and soo ready to be moved on... i think shes just not completely over it theres no reason to try and find an excuse to come to my home @ 1:30 am... i need it to stop but whatever i say or do it doesnt work

you might want to stop answering the door and letting her in?

and yes i do date other people i have my kids half the time so i seperate my life with them and my love life...i think it should be that way.. my kids have already told me about stuff they have seen... mommy being naked on the other man.... and my daughter who is 2 straddling my 4 year old kissing with open mouth because they said they love eachother...like mommy and the other guy..

Solo,

The exact same thing happened to me. Still not sure if the girlfriend was around before the marriage ended but that's neither here nor there. The only thing that truly matters is the kids. Be open, honest and loving with them. Explain that it's hard on you too but nothing will stop you from being their dad. It's what they want to hear and what you need to say.

I sure wish my ex would but I can't control how he behaves. I can only minimize the damage to the kids and give them a loving, fairly stable environment during this time.

Good luck and take it from me, time really does heal.

its upseting because if you went back 4 months ago she would never even think about doing this crap to our kids.... i try to approach her and she says im crazy.. im cordial and calm and nice but she wont let me meet the guy cause she thinks im gonna knock em out.. i feel as a man he should meet me and not run away...the issues is my kids.. and shes on my lease and has a key so everytimre she comes and destroys my home she has recourse.... any suggestions on the approach to the man... he needs to keep his pecker in his pants while my kids are there.... he has been talking to my ex for about 3 months but ive been sleeping with her and doing everything together as a family up until 3 weeks ago.....mentally im out of that relationship and carry new ones with a few different women

You're issue is with her as their mother. He shouldn't be involved at all. She needs to put the kids first, and make better decisions. You're discussions should be with her first, then the courts if nothing changes.

i have text msgs from her saying shes gonna put my kids in the bath upstairs so she can eff the guy downstairs and she did my 4 year old son walked down on them

aswell its difficult for me to move on w someone else if she keeps popping up

Be a grown up and deal with it.
Just make sure you keep close contact with your kids. If you don't they will forget you.

i have my kids more then her usually but legally half.. and i am dealing with it... ****...lol...im just asking for advice

I dont think you really, truly, can get over someone you really loved and shared a lot with.....you just get on with life without them...but there always there in the back of your mind somewhere. You were with her for so long and have a special bond with her x2. It will take time to adjust. In the meantime focus on the children and you. You especially. Take time and re frind yourself who you really are.. now that it isn't you two..

well thanks dear and you kinda know first hand what im going thru..shes like that stupid song stuck in your head you cant get rid of... but i truly have learned alot about the real me through all this... its a shame she took the other direction

Your welcome.. I didn't feel safe leaving you unattended today for a reason.. and now I know.. he he.. JK.. that song will play till a new song will fill your head and play louder. That is all. So pack you rlife with things that will keep you busy and ignoring the music she throws in your head. Everyone makes their beds. Everyone must lie in them too.

well thanks if more come i would appreciate it all the advice i can get will help