First I would like to say sorry to all my mingle friends for being M.I.A.. I will respond to all the mail.

I recently lost my eldest brother to a car accident. Many of you know that I ship out on June 1st to Afghanistan. I have had a lot of prep work and trying to workout my personal life before leaving. My eldest brother, who is my hero, was killed. I am at the moment lost and distraught. I don't have much family in America so everyone that I have means a tremendous amount to me. My brother was a person and one of the best brothers anyone could have. He made a great impression on me and helped mold me into the person I am today. He was on of the best fathers I have ever seen, the kids came first, ALWAYS. He leaves before seeing his third child born and my mother is destroyed inside. I just had to get this off of my chest as I am one to hardly ever bother anyone with my problems. I am going through fits of rage and extreme sadness. I lost my father at the age of 20 and now my eldest brother at 31. I am trying hard to not let the bitterness enter my heart, but its hard, very hard.

Be strong, I know it hurts like hell now but it will get better.

I lost my little brother in a car accident 11 years ago.. i know your pain... it never goes away, but it does get better. It's still hard, it hurts and i still cry at times... holler if you need a friend

I am so sorry for your losses- and i have no advice to give to help you through this as I have not experienced a loss like yours-I have only this to offer-

You carry their spirit and memories of them in your heart- they are with you always. You can talk to them anytime you want- they are always going to be there for you. A love like you had for your Father and your Brother never ever dies- Just trust in the belief they are always around you and you will see them again.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family- It will be hard but you will get through this- You are allowed to grieve and you are allowed to be angry- Mourning is all part of the process and it will get better. Best to you all

Vinay... thoughts are with you

Hold Your Head Up Brother! We're All Here For You!

So sorry to hear of your loss. Prayers & thoughts to you & your family

I'm sorry that you've had such terrible loss in your life. I hope that your heart can heal....

Mingle is a great place to talk to people in general. When you are down then come here and talk to us.

I don't think you find a friendly crowd of people who each have been through alot in life.

I wish you the best recovery possible.

Im sorry to hear about your brother...My prayers are with you

Thank you for enlisting and wanting to serve your country We all pray for your safe return!!!!

I am so sorry for your and your family's loss. There is no way to understand or explain it. I hope you can make peace with it over time. Do try to come to some peace with it before you ship out, you can always think of him as going with you, as your own personal guardian angel watching out for you. You will have two angels, one on each shoulder, your dad and your brother. Take care.

sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Best wishes.

Sorry to hear of your loss.

i'm so sorry...

prayers are being sent your way....

Very sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. I can only imagine what you are dealing with.

Best wishes to you.

And thank you for giving service to our country.

I am so sorry. I can only tell you that I have had a similar situation in my life. My niece died in a car wreck two and a half years ago. I was very close to her and I wasn't sure if I was strong enough to hold up. It is said that God does not give us more than we can handle. The pain has subsided somewhat and I remember her without crying. I visit her grave and that helps now, where before it brought pain. This isn't about me, sorry. It's probably hard to hear but there is a reason for everything. The rage you feel is normal. There are many stages to the grieving process and rage is just one of those. Time with your family in these days will be precious. My heart goes out to you and my prayers are with you and your family.

Thanks everyone for your support and wonderful comments. Its a hard thing to deal with. A little info on my big brother. He was a former army ranger, a big reason why I joined. We even got to serve together in the Army!!! I enjoyed that tremendously. He is the toughest person I have ever meet, physically and mentally, he was a monster. A very intelligent and caring person. Many though he was a little rough but truly he was a realist and told it like it was. I may have never joined the army if it wasn't for him. I needed it, I was a cocky kid who had the world at his hands. I aced high school, was a good football player and recieved a partial sport scholarship to UVA. I injured my knee during practice and ended my career playing I football. At this time my father was diagnosed with throat cancer. I decided to come back and go George Mason University. I was a little disenchanted with the academic world. I got a little wild. My brother brought me back to reality and I joined the army at the age of 18 almost 19. The army instilled respect, honor and integrity in me. Everything my brother told me it would. I love you big brother, I will miss with every breath I take. Until the day we meet again, I will carry on your memory and your children will never be without, I love them as my own. I see you in their face and they are as tough as you!!!! Love you!

I am very sorry for your losses. I also lost my father at age 20. My older brother had a heart attack in his sleep and passed away at age 41. I went through the feelings of rage and severe sadness also. I had all kinds of emotions.
My brother's death brought up my fathers all over again.

You're right it is very hard to not be angry and bitter at this time. I mostly felt shock and it was hard to believe it was happening at the time. Then I felt angry at everyone.

Just know that you will get through it and that they will always be a part of you