I saved this one from another site and thought it a good one to
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(CS) Rep. : Yes, Ma'am, how can I help you today?

Customer: Well, after much consideration, I've decided to install LOVE.
Can you guide me through the process?

CS Rep. : Yes, I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?

Customer: Well, I'm not very technical, but I think I'm ready to install
now. What do I do first?

CS Rep. : The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your
HEART ma'am?

Customer: Yes I have, but there are several other programs running right
now. Is it okay to install while they are running?

CS Rep. : What programs are running ma'am?

Customer: Let's see, I have PAST-HURT.EXE, LOW-ESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE,
and RESENTMENT.COM running right now.

CS Rep. : No problem. LOVE will gradually erase PAST-HURT.EXE from your
current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it
will no longer disrupt other programs. LOVE will eventually overwrite
LOW-ESTEEM.EXE with a module of its own called HIGH-ESTEEM.EXE. However,
you have to completely turn off GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM. Those
programs prevent LOVE from being properly installed. Can you turn those
off ma'am?

Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

CS Rep. : My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS.EXE.
Do this as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM
have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, done. LOVE has started installing itself automatically.
Is that normal?

CS Rep. : Yes. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall
for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message?

Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely installed?

CS Rep. : Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You
need to begin connecting to other HEART's in order to get the upgrades.

Customer: Oops. I have an error message already. What should I do?

CS Rep. : What does the message say?

Customer: It says 'ERROR 412 - PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS.'
What does that mean?

CS Rep. : Don't worry ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that the
LOVE program is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been
run on your HEART. It is one of those complicated programming things,
but in non-technical terms it means you have to 'LOVE' your own machine
before it can 'LOVE' others.

Customer: So what should I do?

CS Rep. : Can you pull down the directory called 'SELF-ACCEPTANCE'?
Customer: Yes, I have it.

CS Rep. : Excellent. You're getting good at this.

Customer: Thank you.

CS Rep. : You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy
them to the 'MYHEART' directory: FORGIVE-SELF.DOC, REALIZE-WORTH.TXT,
and ACKNOWLEDGE-LIMITATIONS.DOC. The system will overwrite any
conflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, you
need to delete VERBOSE-SELF-CRITIC.EXE from all directories, and then
empty your recycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and
never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My HEART is filling up with new files. SMILE.MPG
is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that PEACE.EXE, and
CONTENTMENT.COM are copying themselves all over my HEART. Is this
normal?

CS Rep. : Sometimes. For others it takes a while, but eventually
everything gets downloaded at the proper time. So, LOVE is installed and
running. You should be able to handle it from here. One more thing
before I go. Customer: Yes?

CS Rep. : LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules
to everybody you meet. They will in turn share it with other people and
they will return some similarly cool modules back to you.

Customer: I will. Thanks for your help. By the way, what's your name?

CS Rep. : You can call me the Divine Cardiologist, also known as The
Great Physician, but most call me God. Most people feel all they need is
an annual check-up to stay heart-healthy, but the manufacturer (Me)
suggests a schedule of daily maintenance for maximum efficiency. Put
another way, keep in touch........

still love this one- it's so sweet.
hey andrea hows u?

Tom, do you really think it funny??
If it was meant like that it would be under jokes, no?

Oh my bad, I should have replaced certain letters


So if you read would you please replace CS with JSH